Page 41 of The Negotiator

She stopped in front of a four-foot tree. It managed to be both too short and too tall. Flurries whirled around her head. None of it stuck to the ground but a few specks melted in her hair.

“You should wear a hat.”

He was there.At the sound of Garrett’s voice, she spun around so fast she slipped on a slick spot in the grass. Her heart thudded loud enough to drown out everything else. She tried to think of the right thing to say but nothing came to her.

Her gaze wandered over him. She took in the tired eyes and thin line of his mouth. She could see black pants and a jacket and little else because he’d bundled up tight in his jacket and scarf.

“You’re here.” It was the first thing that popped into her brain.

He glanced around, his gaze lingering on the trees. That’s all it took for her sympathy to rise. With everything that had passed between them, she knew it had to be hard for him here.

He kept coming back and one of these times he wouldn’t. The thought made her want to heave.

When his gaze shot back to her some of the cloudiness had cleared. “I’m here for you. Because I can’t stay away.”

It would be so unfair to give her hope then snatch it away. That wasn’t who he was or had ever been with her, but trust came hard for her. She’d been tested and bruised, but when it came to him her armor fell.

“You were so angry,” she said, trying to block out his face when he walked out the door.

“Because it felt like you gave up on us. That you wanted to push us back into what we were.” He shook his head. “I’ll negotiate and fight, but I can’t just be your friend, Lauren.”

“I don’t want that.” She abandoned thoughts about trees and the holidays and concentrated on him. Said the words that made her ache. “I missed you.”

He closed his eyes for a second. When he opened them again some of the exhaustion had cleared. “Two damn days and I missed you so much I couldn’t see straight.”

The breath rushed out of her so quickly her chest burned. “I’ve been so careful for so long.”

“Me, too.” He slipped off his gloves and stuffed them in his pockets. “But I don’t want to be. Not anymore.”

The words chipped away at the wall she’d built to hold him back. They sounded so familiar because that’s how she lived, too. “What changed?”

“I met this hot woman with a boat and she turned my life upside down.” He put his hands on her hips. “I screwed up and yelled. I walked out when I should have stayed and fought.”

“I pushed you.”

His smile didn’t reach his eyes but his hands were soothing. They skimmed up and down her arms, pulling her closer. “I negotiate for a living. I convince people to do things, but I couldn’t think of a way to make you understand that for the first time ever, I don’t want to be alone in December.”

He said the right things. Snagged her with this intense look that held her in that spot. “I’ve spent my whole life pushing people away but I can’t watch you leave me again.”

That’s not what she meant to say. But then he was in front of her, holding her. She wanted to wipe the pain off his face and take him home with her. Forget her past and her relationship failures. Put Carl and the pain of being lied to aside and focus on the man who had been nothing but decent and devoted for months. The one she took for granted.

“I was hoping you’d let me help you with the tree.” His voice actually cracked as he spoke.

A rush of love swamped her. “That sounds like something people who are dating and committed might do.”

“I want both of those things with you.” He dropped a soft kiss on her nose. “I at least want us to try. Tell me what you want and I’ll try to give it to you.”

“You’re negotiating.” And she loved it because he didn’t just expect her to change and give in. For him it was a back and forth.

His hand cupped her cheek. “This is the most important negotiation of my life.”

Everything she never knew she wanted loomed in front of her. All she had to do was reach out and grab it. Take the risk.

She slipped her hand over his. “I’m not easy.”

He snorted. “I’ve got you beat. I’ve spent years running away from ornaments and Christmas carols. I’ve blocked the whole holiday.”

Laughter bubbled up inside her. “You understand that I’m halfway down the road to loving you. I think it started months ago, but it happened.”