Page 73 of A Pact of Blood

The starkest rays of sunshine dwindle. The images fade with them, but the swell of longing in my chest remains.

Perhaps… Perhaps there is a way.

The jolt of that inspiration sends me to my feet. I waver there for a moment, the implications of what I’m considering so huge that I’ve lost my breath completely.

Do I really dare? Would such a plan be outright madness?

Marclinus’s sneering face and vicious words come back to me, and my hands clench at my sides.

What am I consigning myself and everyone else I care about to if Idon’ttake action?

It’s so much, so big… So far beyond what I originally planned…

Resolve unfurls inside me, grounding me. I head out of the room and through the halls to my chambers.

My maids have come through and tidied the room, but it’s empty now. I settle cross-legged on the rug and tap myfingers down my front in the gesture of the divinities. With each inhalation and exhalation, I give myself over to the meditation.

Elox, you’ve led me well before. Be my shepherd. What if another murder is the only way to peace? What would you have me do now?

The light plays across my closed eyelids, filtering through the pear tree leaves rustling outside the windows. The breeze tickles across my skin.

The field I’ve seen before in dreams and visions forms behind my eyes. I’m kneeling in the grass, the green blades splattered with crimson.

A lamb stands before me. As I study it, it steps forward and rests its muzzle on my shoulder as if embracing me.

A sputter of a laugh bursts from my lips and breaks the scene.

If that’s supposed to be Marclinus, he’s never going to come to me like that. He sees everything I do, everything I am as pathetic.

But of course, there is no clear answer. I lean back to lie on the rug, peering up at the ceiling and puzzling the image over.

Was the lamb meant to be the emperor? The field was bloody too, as if battles had been fought there. The animal could simply represent the peace I’m striving for, indicating that it is within reach.

It could represent a child I’ll one day hold in my arms.

I know my godlen has never approved of violence unless it was absolutely necessary. Elox might be telling me to be patient—but what if I end up sacrificing both my country and the men who’ve won my heart because I bided my time?

I sit up again, my jaw setting firmly. I can be patient for a little while, because I’ll need to be anyway. My monster of ahusband will have at least nine months to prove himself tome.

First things first. I need to concoct a potion that’ll flush the mirewort from my body.

I open my trunk and take out my brewing equipment.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Aurelia

Isway and spin on the dance floor, now in Marclinus’s arms and now in one of his noblemen’s. This once, it’s easy to keep my smile on my face.

The deep well of calm I’ve often turned to has spread through my chest, cool and soothing, as if I’m soaking in a tranquil pool.

I’m taking back control over my fate. There’s more than one way to transform a pawn into a queen.

At the end of a dance with one of the viceroys, I happen as if by chance to be standing a few paces away from Bastien. When he glances my way, I twitch my hand at my side to catch his attention and then form a few hasty gestures without glancing straight at him.

You three meet me in your room. Eleventh bell.

Bastien meanders onward, but not without a twist of his fingers that simply indicates,Yes.

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