Page 76 of A Pact of Blood

I wet my lips. “I don’t think I’m going to accomplish anything I hoped to as empress while our new emperor is making the decisions. But if I can continue winning the rest of Dariu over as I’ve started to—if he then met some unfortunate end…”

Bastien’s face tenses and Lorenzo simply stares at me, but Raul guffaws in approval. “You are bloodthirsty under all that talk of peace, aren’t you, Shepherdess?”

I can’t stop myself from glowering at him. “I’d rather not harm anyone at all. But if it’s that or watch Marclinus harm who knows how many more people, it’s clear which action is more on the side of peace.”

Bastien sets his hand on my shoulder with an affectionate squeeze but worry shining in his eyes. “To pull it off—you couldn’t use the same trick as with Tarquin. Any kind of illness so soon after his father’s might raise suspicions.”

Ah. He isn’t bothered that I’ve made the suggestion, only that it might get me into trouble.

I brush his rumpled auburn hair away from his temple, reveling in the brief warmth that blooms between our skin. “I wouldn’t go about it any way that I thought could be tied back to me or seem connected to Tarquin’s death. And I’ll have quite a bit of time to strategize.”

“You’re waiting until after all the confirmation rites?”Lorenzo suggests.“That shouldn’t take more than another month or two.”

“Well, there’s something else I’ll need in order to solidify my place as empress, considering that I’m not part of the imperial line—not even distantly, not even Darium myself.” I inhale slowly. “I need to be the mother of the next emperor or empress-to-be.”

All three of the princes stiffen.

Raul’s eyes flash. “You shouldn’t have to let that maniac of a husband—to have to carry his spawn inside you?—”

I hold up my hand to stop further protests. “I don’t like that idea either. Which is why it occurred to me… the child doesn’t have to be his. Not as long as everyone else believes it is.”

The stunned silence afterward stretches even longer than the first. Lorenzo’s lips part and then press shut again.“You mean…”

Even after the hours I’ve spent thinking about this moment, a blush burns my cheeks. “I won’t be taking any more mirewort. Based on my cycle, this should be an opportune time… I hadn’t thought I’d bring a child into the world this early, but if it’s the only way to protect everything I’m working toward, I’d rather it was with someone I actually admire.”

Raul shifts his weight on his feet, looking uncharacteristically awkward. “You know I can’t provide that service.”

I meet Bastien’s gaze. “It would have to be you. Your coloring is much closer to Marclinus’s than Lorenzo’s.” I glance at Lorenzo with an apologetic grimace. “Not that I wouldn’t want you just as much—but the chances that the baby’s appearance would raise questions?—”

He dips his head in understanding.“I never would have thought I’d have the opportunity in the first place.”

Bastien sputters. “Neither would I.”

I wrench my attention back to the prince of Cotea, reaching to caress his cheek. “You don’t have to agree. It’s a huge thing to ask. You’d probably never be able to treat the child as your own—I don’t know how much you’d get to interact with him or her, even if I can remove Marclinus from the throne, depending on how careful we still needed to be …”

Bastien’s jaw works, his dark green eyes piercing into mine. He dips his head toward me to claim a kiss, one I offer up without any hesitation at all.

His hands settle on my waist, holding me in front of him. His mouth melds with mine, gentle and then more demanding. A giddy shiver races down my spine at the promise of passion.

Bastien keeps his desires tightly in check most of the time behind his studied reserve. But I’ve gotten a taste of how easily he can turn his authoritative airs into a dominating presence when the mood is right. He’s anything but a passive partner.

When he breaks from the kiss, he stares down at me, his gaze heated but pensive. His voice comes out commanding. “Tell me why you’d want me even if it wasn’t for this scheme. Why this means more than simply outmaneuvering Marclinus.”

As confident as he sounds, the order hints at his earlier insecurities about my affections. A pang shoots through my chest.

I loop my arms around his neck, stroking the hair that tumbles to the nape, and gaze right back at him. “From the moment I arrived in the imperial court, I could tell you have a mind and a will to be reckoned with. And if sometimes you turned that cleverness against me, you’re also canny and kind enough to admit when you’re wrong and make amends. I trust you to be both strong and tender when I need it. You’ve been willing to risk what little security you have to protect me. I know my heart and my life are safe in your hands.”

The corner of my mouth ticks upward. “And it certainly doesn’t hurt that you’re absolutely stunning to look at.”

I pause, and the deeper truth I’ve been resisting since I first started falling for these men rises up my throat.

Why should I deny it any longer? Why shouldn’t he hear just how much he means to me?

The sweet, naïve feelings that stirred in me years ago in Gavril’s presence are nothing compared to the ache of devotion that burns in me now.

My voice goes raw, but the words come out clearly enough. “I love you. I wish we could be together like this every day instead of just stolen moments.”

Bastien makes a rough noise, and then he’s pulling me into another kiss, his mouth capturing mine with a searing heat that has me melting into him.