Page 136 of Life of the Party

Mackenzie, I hope you miss me

When I’m gone, when I’m gone.

I gotta go now, but you need to know how

Much you’re loved, how much you’re loved…

In the dark alone, now there’s only me.

I’m staring at the moonlight shining silver in the streets.

The city lights are twinkling, glowing like her eyes.

No matter where I go, she’s always on my mind.

Mackenzie, I hope you miss me,

When I’m gone, when I’m gone.

I’m away now, but you need to know how

Much you’re loved, how much you’re loved…”

The room was struck with silence as the song slowly ebbed, the beautiful notes fading softly away.

“Wow.” Marcy was the first to speak, her voice awed, no louder than a whisper. “That was really good.”

Mom’s eyes had tears in them. She smiled at Grey. “That was beautiful.” She nodded. “Really. Beautiful.”

I glanced over at Grey. He accepted my family’s compliments with great aplomb, but his blue eyes didn’t leave my face for a second—like my opinion was the only one that mattered, the only one he really needed to hear.

There was nothing I could say to do it justice. Completely oblivious to the family members surrounding us, I crossed the room and threw my arms around his neck.

“Thank you,” I whispered in his ear. “I love it.” And then, because that wasn’t enough either, I kissed him deep and long, my arms around him, my fingers twirling through his dark hair. We stayed that way, oblivious, until Blake cleared his throat, jolting us back to the present. I’d totally forgotten our surroundings, had totally forgotten everything but Grey’s lips on mine. We broke away, sheepish, but no one seemed appalled or annoyed by our affection. They looked at Grey, and then they looked at me, and whatever they saw there made them smile.

Maybe it was the simple happiness I could feel radiating from me, shining like the lights on the Christmas tree. Whatever it was, they seemed to approve. And then Iknew, without a doubt, that Grey had won over my parents. Grey had won over my family, just like I knew he would. All he needed was a chance.

Nothing could have made me happier. It was all so easy after that. Grey spotted my chess set and challenged Blake to a game. Blake smiled at the challenge and helped Grey set up the board on the coffee table.

I sat by Marcy, who looked stunning in a white cowl-neck sweater and the dangly silver earrings I’d given her, and we watched them play chess. I didn’t understand a thing; I made up my mind to give Grey the chess set as soon as we got home. He was holding his own against Blake, of all people—which was impressive to me.

Mom and Dad sat nearby. Dad had an arm slung loosely over Mom’s shoulders. They looked very cozy, and happy, snacking, laughing. It was very peaceful.

I knew one thing would make it even better.

The first symptoms of withdrawal were already hitting me. I’d been distracted, with Grey’s arrival and the car and the CD and everything, I hadn’t really noticed the severity of my craving. It had my full attention now. I couldn’t ignore the sweat beading on my brow, the sudden weakness in my limbs. I couldn’t wait, I didn’t want to wait. I wrapped an arm around myself, fidgeting and uncomfortable. I needed to do some more heroin. And I needed to do it now.

“Mackenzie, you okay?” Grey eyed me cautiously, instantly aware. He gave me a knowing look.

“Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” I sat up, shakily. “I think I just ate too much.”

“Do you need anything, honey?” Mom wondered.

“No, I’m okay. I’ll be right back.” I hurried up the stairs to my old bedroom, where my supplies were stashed in my overnight bag. I took them all into the nearest bathroom and shut the door. Quickly, my blood pounding in my ears, I fought back the nausea and started a batch. The sickness made my hands shake and it took me way longer than normal to get the heroin into the syringe.

I squeezed my hand shut. I felt better knowing relief was near, that soon the bliss would find me and have its way. My veins were slow to pop. I clenched and re-clenched my fist until one was near enough to the surface. Then, slowly, compensating for the shakiness of my hands, I plunged the needle into my skin.

“You okay honey? I’ve got some Gravol here if you…” The door began to open. I realized with horror that in my haste, I’d forgotten to lock the door.

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