Page 142 of Life of the Party

“There. All done.” She proclaimed finally. “Let’s go get dressed.”

I nodded woodenly. She handed out our uniforms for the night. They were actually kind of cool, made to resemble a man’s tuxedo, with short dark skirts and white sleeveless blouses ruffled down the front. A cute little bow tie went around the neck.

Charlie and Courtney giggled as they got ready, excited for the night. I went through the motions of having fun, but I wasn’t there in spirit. I needed to get high, but I knew I couldn’t. Not when I had to work.

“We look hot!” Charlie exclaimed with her usual exuberance. She and Courtney were standing in front of the floor-length mirror. “Mac, aren’t you going to look?”

I bit my lip, hesitant. I wanted so badly to enjoy what they were enjoying, to laugh with them, to be light-hearted. I stood awkwardly beside Charlie, who grasped me around the waist, and then looked into the mirror.

I didn’t look as bad as I thought I might. Charlie was truly the worker of miracles. Where before my cheeks had been sallow, they now held the soft bloom of pink blush. My eyes were too big, overwhelming my skinny face, but they were lined with dark and silver, metallic and smoky. My lips were as deep red as Courtney’s always were. My hair up in a ponytail, curly and voluminous—but it had lost its shine.

Maybe I looked okay, but I still barely recognized myself. I gazed down at my arms. “What about these?” I choked out. Neither of the other girls had deep red marks and cuts on their arms. For some reason, this made me want to cry again.

“Don’t worry about that, Mac.” Charlie soothed. “I’ve got just the thing.” She rummaged around in her room for a moment, producing a pair of white cuff bracelets that seemed to be made for the occasion. She put the bracelets around my forearms. They managed to hide the majority of the marks on my arms.

When she was done, she squeezed my hands and looked deep into my eyes.

“It’s going to be okay, Mac.” She promised me with a hopeful smile. “Just relax.”

I nodded dumbly. Courtney got out some more cocaine and made some rails for us. I took mine without feeling, like I was a robot on automatic pilot or something.

The drugs helped. They gave me some energy, some gusto. They made me think maybe Charlie was right. Maybe everything would be okay.

A slight smile graced my lips. And then it was gone.

CHAPTER 57

I relied heavily on cocaine for the rest of the night, to keep me going. It was amazingly easy to just bend down behind the counter and sniff some back without anyone noticing. The place was packed almost instantly, full of rowdy people. Everyone was there for a good time. It was New Year’s Eve. Champagne was flowing. Every now and then I’d look out at the sea of people in their bright party hats, laughing and dancing like they didn’t have a care in the world, and I’d imagine I was them. Before things got so out of control, I was one of them.

There for a good time. Careless. Happy.

Grey would come to visit me at the bar when the band wasn’t playing. They had five different sets to play, dispersed throughout the evening. The only time I’d smile, like really smile, was when he was with me.

“Do you get to bring that uniform home?” He wondered clandestinely, leaning over the bar to speak the words so I’d hear him over the deafening crowd.

“I think that could be arranged,” I promised slyly. I couldn’t believe he still found me attractive. I knew what I looked like. Did he actually even see me anymore? Couldn’t he see what I’d become?

“Mmm…” His blue eyes were wicked as they looked me over. “How much longer will this stupid party go for?”

“At least midnight,” I giggled. It was so easy with him, to be happy. Even despite everything else. “I think that’s the tradition, anyway.”

“Right.” He grinned.

“Will you come find me at midnight? So I can kiss you?”

“Like I’d ever be able to turn that down.” He smirked. But apparently he couldn’t wait until midnight. He set his drink down and kissed me before he left to start another set. I smiled at his handsome face.

Even his voice helped. I could hear him singing as I worked, hear his glorious, velvet voice rasping away over the speakers, and it buoyed my spirits. I did some more cocaine, and I almost felt jovial, letting the happy little trembles erase the feeling of despair that nagged at me. When their set ended, going out on a high note of wailing guitars and screaming fans, my spirits rose even further. Grey would be with me again soon. A wide smile spread across my face. Charlie noticed as she came into the bar, her beautiful face relieved, happy, her blue eyes sparkling. She grabbed my hands and spun me around in a little dance. Our patrons cheered for us, and I was actually giggling when she finally let me go.

I stopped twirling right in front of his face.

“Mackenzie.” Riley was the only one in the entire crowd completely serious. I stopped short, surprised to find him there. He looked…had he always been this good-looking? His dark hair was buzzed short; his face, so wonderfully familiar, looked older, wiser almost. He had filled out, too; no longer was he lean and lank. He looked…he looked like a man. I cleared my throat.

“Hello, sir.” I tried to play it casual. “What can I get you? On the house.”

Riley didn’t answer me. He just stared. He stared and stared. His warm chocolate eyes didn’t leave my face for a second. It made me uncomfortable. I wanted to cringe away from his gaze because I knew Riley would see too much. Didn’t he always? Didn’t he always just…know, somehow?

The club was full of people, but suddenly there was only me and him. And all he did was stare. His expression revealed nothing; I couldn’t tell what was going through his mind, what he was thinking.

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