Page 140 of Life of the Party

I felt something again.

I opened my eyes, and now they were gleaming.

CHAPTER 56

“Do you have to go?” I looked up at Grey, hopefully. Damn, he was gorgeous. It was impossible not to feel good, at the moment, with the liquid heroin dancing deep within my blood stream. I couldn’t help but feel content.

He chuckled at me, rubbing remnants from the cocaine he’d just done across his gums. “Sorry, sugar. We have to play tonight, and I haven’t practiced in…” he flexed his stiff fingers, “way too long.”

I moaned. We both had to work that night. The Aurora was re-opening after the Christmas break with its annual New Year’s Eve party. Apparently it was a huge event, bringing in crowds of people every year. Grey’s band was slated to play and I was going to be stationed in the bar. Walter had trained me to work there himself, as quickly and abruptly as he did everything else—but I actually liked it. It was easier to bartend than to try and squeeze through the drunken throng, carrying a tray and trying not to get stepped on. It was harried and chaotic behind the bar, remembering recipes and shooter mixes and trying to keep up with the orders being screamed at me, but I always liked a challenge.

The biggest challenge yet was going to be getting out of bed. I didn’t want to leave the room; I didn’t really want to face the world, but Grey insisted it would be good for me to get up and out of the house. I think he was worried. Because of the heroin. We hadn’t just slipped from the precipice of control, we’d jumped headfirst off of it, and now we had to try and regain some measure of the life we’d left behind on the cliff.

I didn’t know if I could. I didn’t really want to. I could’ve spent the rest of my life with Grey in our room, his arms wrapped around me, drugs in our systems, staringout the big picture window at the twinkling stars, the bright face of the moon peeking out over soft silver clouds. Like we’d done on so many nights. Happy. Together.

He smirked at the play of sadness on my face as I watched him get ready to go. How rapidly this man had become my whole entire life. Even an afternoon without him was like total agony. If I could’ve felt sad at that moment, I would’ve.

“It’s only for the afternoon, Mackenzie. I’ll see you tonight, at the club.” He chided.

“I know you will. But I miss you already.” I pouted. “I love you, you know.”

Grey laughed at my dramatics. “I love you, too.” It was easy for him to say now, but I never tired of hearing it. I gave him a glorious smile as he bent to kiss me goodbye, taking advantage of his nearness and grasping his hands to pull him closer yet.

“Will you play my song tonight?” I wondered in his ear.

“Hmmm…maybe. It’s not exactly to the tune of “Auld Lang Synge”though, is it?”

I giggled. “I guess not. I just want everyone to know.”

“Know what?” His blue eyes shone at me.

“That I’m yours.”

“Mackenzie,” he smirked, “that’s never been a question.”

And though he left me then, he left me on a good note. My lips were still tingling from his kisses as I fell back onto our bed with a sigh, dreading the long hours until we would be together again. I hated when Grey was gone, I hated being alone.

I sat on our bed, tracing a finger down the red scabby lines that crossed my arm, lines I’d somehow managed to hide from him. I knew I shouldn’t push off; I knew I had to be sober enough to concentrate on work in only a few hours. I just couldn’t handle the quiet. When the heroin began to fade, when there was no one else around, the thoughts began to seep in. Thoughts of sorrow and despair. Of utter hopelessness.

Thoughts I couldn’t handle.

I cooked myself up a batch and shot it quickly. I was a pro by now; the needle didn’t bother me at all. I still let Grey do it for me most of the time, but only because he liked to do it for me. He wanted to be the one to give me pleasure, of any kind.

I was still lying back against the bed, slack and motionless, when my cell phone started to ring. I sighed and rolled over to answer it.

“Mac! Where the hell are you?” Charlie giggled over the phone.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“You’re supposed to come over, remember? To get ready for tonight.”

“Oh, yeah. Shit.” I sat up.

“Grab your stuff and get over here.”

“I just woke up.” I lied. “I haven’t showered or anything.”

“Do it over here. I’ve got your uniform for tonight. It’s sexyyyy.”

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