Page 40 of Marrying a Spy

Chapter Thirteen

The tension in the car felt like fog on a spring morning. There had been a moment back there where she was sure Noah was going to quit this charade and finally admit his feelings for her. Every time he said he planned on leaving she was pretty sure he was lying.

He’d been so close to her earlier that she’d sworn he was moments away from leaning down and kissing her. She shivered and her heart pounded at the thought.

She reached up and touched her lips. They tingled from the memory of kissing him during the photography shoot. Everything around her had blurred during that moment. The only thing she could focus on was Noah and the way he felt against her. She wanted to feel that again.

Her heart hammered in her chest as they pulled into her driveway. The desire to touch him was winning out over her fear of getting hurt. It had been easier to resist when she thought he was this horrible guy who’d come back just to break her heart. But at every turn, he was proving her wrong—even if he seemed hell-bent on trying to tell her otherwise.

The look he gave her right before the waiter had surprised them wasn’t something a person could fake. It was real. And all she wanted to do was explore their potential together.

She stepped out into the crisp night air. She took a deep breath, hoping to calm her mind. She couldn’t just jump back into a relationship with Noah. What if she got hurt? What if he left? Could her heart handle it if he walked out on her again?

No. It couldn’t. But for some reason, with every beat, all it wanted was to love Noah again. He was here. She could feel him. See him. That was all she wanted. She felt safer with him than she did when she was alone. And the last thing she wanted was to be alone again.

When they got to her front door, she pulled out her keys and opened the door. The darkness washed over them as she stepped inside. After finding the light switch, she turned to see Noah standing in the entryway, his hands in his front pockets.

When he glanced over at her, she could see the uncertainty in his gaze. She wanted to move. She wanted to feel his arms around her again, but what if she was reading him wrong? What if he didn’t want the same?

Noah ran his hand through his hair and started to move toward the hall. “I’m going to get ready for bed.”

Sophia nodded as she watched him walk past her. Why wasn’t he acting on the feelings that were written all over his face? Was she just crazy to think that he cared about her as much as she was desperately trying not to care for him?

Unable to stand there trying to digest his feelings, she made her way to her room, where she dressed in her nightgown. After she threw her robe on, she opened the door to find him standing on the other side. His hand was outstretched and resting on the doorframe.

Her breath caught in her throat as she took in his stance. He was studying the ground.

“Noah?” she asked. Her breath came out soft and hesitant.

He straightened and brought his gaze up to meet hers. In that moment, she could feel everything he was trying so hard not to say. She closed the gap, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him toward her.

When her lips found his, she crushed her body against his. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her up. He moved to press her against the wall.

Her lips moved against his. She wanted to know—no, needed to know what he was thinking. Even though it had been so long, did he still care for her like she did for him?

He pulled back for a moment, and she groaned in protest. He studied her. She held his gaze, hoping he could read her intentions—that he could see how she felt. How she had always felt.

His hand moved from her back up to her cheek, where he ran his thumb over her skin. She responded by moving her hands across his chest. She could feel his scars under his shirt. They were a part of his past that she wanted to know about. She wanted him to trust her enough to tell her the story.

When her fingers got to the bottom of his shirt, she fingered the hem. As if he sensed what she was about to do, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. This time, they were softer, more inviting. He was giving her permission.

She raised his shirt. He lifted up his arms and helped her pull it off. She dropped her gaze to his bare chest and brought her fingers up to trace every scar that spread across his skin.

He watched her as she explored. Sophia’s mind swirled as she thought of the pain that he must have experienced. There was this whole part of his life that she knew nothing about. And that hurt her so much that her chest squeezed. There was a canyon of distance between them.

She was tired of that distance. She was ready to close the gap and start again. So ready.

Her fingers made their way up to his shoulders and then around his neck. When she turned her attention back to him, she caught his gaze again. He held it for a moment before he leaned into her and met her lips.

The warmth that exploded through her took her breath away. She held onto him as if he were a life raft. For so long, she’d tried to pretend that she was strong. That nothing her father or Noah would do could affect her. But that wasn’t the truth.

And standing here, kissing Noah, she knew that she wanted this. All of it. She wanted it more than breathing. Kissing Noah was healing the cracks in her heart. She wanted to trust him. Fully. Completely.

Noah left her lips to kiss a trail across her cheeks. He nibbled on her ear before making his way down her neck. She tipped her head back and allowed a moan to escape her lips.

Before she could stop herself, the words “I’ve always loved you,” tumbled from her lips.

Noah stopped, pulling back to study her. Unsure of what he was going to do, she met his gaze. Fear built up in her chest as she waited for his response. Seconds ticked by as he remained quiet.

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