Page 107 of When to Call a Blitz

Heidi nods. “I was very sad. He was my favorite person in the world.”

“I never met mom.”

Heidi looks at me, and my heart melts.

There comes a time when you have a decision to make. Sink or swim. Choose to leave your soul in the past and grow old as a shell of yourself, withering away without anyone truly knowing you, or you let someone in and allow them to change how you see the world. I’ve always thought the first option would be less painful.

But as the hours tick by, Juniper curled up between Heidi and I as we talk to her about the wonderful memories we had with the people we lost in our lives, it becomes clear that I’ve just been waiting for the day Heidi was ready to be in my life, too.

I fought it for too long, but there was never any world where I would live out my life without her in it.

“Dad?” Juniper yawns.

“Yeah, Bug?”

She looks at me quizzically.

“Why do you call me Bug?”

I smile.

“Your mom loved butterflies. Blue butterflies, specifically. They were her absolute favorite. You don’t see them often, so every time she did she would get so happy,” I smile at the memory. “But I would always tease her about it. I’d joke that they were just bugs.”

Technically, I was right. But they are beautiful, and I love them just as much as she does now.

“Your mom brought you home in a blanket that was covered in blue butterflies, and I told her that if she wasn’t careful, you would turn into a bug.” Heidi smiles through her tears, realization dawning on her perfect face, her mind going back to that night. “So, I’ve called you Bug ever since.”

I watch as her fingers find her necklace, her rubbing it between them, and I reach for mine, tucked away under my shirt.

“Did she love anything else?” Juniper asks.

“She loved sunsets.”

“Do you think of her a lot?”

“Yes, I do.”

Heidi rests her head against my shoulder as we look out the window.

We settle into a comfortable silence when Juniper asks, “Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think we could watch the sunset tonight?”

“I do, Bug. I do.”

Pulling her into me, I place a kiss on Heidi’s forehead.

“I have one last question,” she promises, holding her finger up. I nod in encouragement. “Sundays the super bowl, but can you have cake with us?”

Heidi and I grin at the same time. She’s continued to make cake on Sundays, but most of the time I’m not here to see it.

“I think we can arrange that,” I promise as I look at Heidi.

She nods. “I’ll make some for you to bring to the hotel and we can FaceTime each other,” she assures.

We’ll be jumping on a plane tomorrow, on our way down south for the big game. Although I’m staying separately from my family at first, we’ll all be in the same room after. I bought them a room in the same hotel as we’re staying in.

---