Page 14 of Stray for You

“Yeah, sorry, work stuff,” I say.

I’m not sure why I lie to her. Normally I wouldn’t, but admitting to her of all people that I’m getting texts from Julian is something I simply can’t bring myself to do. How could I admit to her that I’m talking to a guy connected to one of the worsttimes of her life? It wasn’t Julian’s fault that Dad left, but he sure as hell didn’t make that time period any easier on me and Mom.

Don’t care, I text back.

The response comes quickly.You don’t, but I do. Seriously, Cam, I want to apologize. I shouldn’t have gone for it like that.

I stare at my phone screen. Is Julian being sincere? Is this actually happening? I can’t handle this. I don’t want to handle this. There are too many conflicting feelings caught up in this, too much history. Julian was an annoyance when we were in high school; he was an ass when we were in college and our moms were dating and he wouldn’t stop harping on me about it. I don’t know what to do with this new adult version of him who kisses me without warning but issues a credible apology for it.

Okay, fine, I say.Apology accepted. Leave me alone.

I shoot off the text and stuff my phone back in my pocket. The quickest way to be rid of Julian is to give him what he wants. I do my best to tune back into the sauce conversation, but all I have to offer is my bland agreement that it’s good.

“Come on, Cameron,” Aunt Mary says. “Good? That’s all you’ve got?”

I shrug with my mouth full. I don’t know how to describe sauce other than “good” or “not good.” It’s not like it’s all that important. It tastes decent enough, and I honestly can’t tell the difference between this and whatever she used last week.

“The boy has never been a foodie,” Mom says. “I used to have to give him plain toast. Nothing on it. Literally just toasted bread. He wouldn’t accept anything else for breakfast for an entire year when he was about five.”

Aunt Mary is laughing, and I’m trying not to flush with embarrassment.

“I was a kid,” I complain.

“I know,” Mom says fondly. “You were my baby boy. You still are.”

I am. No matter how old I get, a piece of me will always be her baby boy. That’s why having Julian appear is messing with me so bad. I don’t want anything or anyone who could hurt her to get within a twenty mile radius of my mom. She’s always taken care of me. The least I can do is not make out with the guy connected to such a hard time in our lives.

As though on cue, my phone vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out, prepared to tell Julian to screw off, but the message I get isn’t some snide remark like I’d expect.

I want to take you out to dinner, he writes.

I must have missed the message because several more follow.

Please, Cam.

Just this once.

Let me be a decent guy to you one time.

Then I’ll leave Seattle and it won’t even matter anymore.

I’ll never bother you again.

Even in text form, desperation undercuts the messages. I can hear his voice in my ears, pleading with me to give him this one opportunity to prove he’s not everything I assume he is, he’s not that guy who made my life hell when our moms were dating. He isn’t here to hurt me — or her.

I struggle to reconcile the man texting me with the person I knew back in New Jersey. My lips hum with the memory of that kiss, a kiss I didn’t pull away from the way I should have. Is there any possibility that Julian Brooks isn’t exactly the man he’s always been? Is there any chance he’s changed?

I shouldn’t want to find out, but when I start tapping at my phone, I don’t tell him to jump off a bridge like I should.

Fine, I write.Friday night. That’s the only time I’m free.

It’s a lie, but setting guardrails around this gives me something sturdy to cling to while my heart races around my chest like it’s on fire. Julian responds instantly with the name of a really nice place downtown, a place I could never afford.

If he insists on inserting himself back into my life, at least I’ll get a free meal out of it.

Chapter Eight

Julian

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