Page 79 of Allison

“There is something physically wrong with Allison,” Worm states, watching Emma’s reaction to his words. “Making sure she’s healthy is my first priority, then I’ll spend the rest of our lives groveling and making it up to her.” Emma grins at him and he notices some of the other women nodding and smiling so he figures he has the right idea on how to fix things with Allison.

“Allison isn’t sick, Russell,” Charlotte interjects, reminding Worm that all of his personal life is playing out in front of his team and their women. Although, he isn’t the first one on the team to go through tough times and have the team witness it. He’d been there to support his brothers when they were in need and he knows his brothers will be there to support him, too.

“Then what’s wrong with her?” Worm asks. “It’s not normal for her to be so tired, vomiting, and passing out like she’s been doing.” His gut is screaming at him. He knows she isn’t well and he can’t stand the thought of her being sick. He needs to be there for her, to help her when she’s down, but she hasn’t allowed him to even be in the same room with her in weeks.

“You know I can’t tell you what’s wrong with her,” Charlotte informs him. “Just believe me when I say she will be fine, but you do need to get back in her good graces, the sooner the better. That’s all I’m going to say about the matter.” Worm nods his understanding.

“Holy shit!” Abigail exclaims then slaps her hand over her mouth. Everyone turns to look at her. She stares into Worm’s eyes. Abigail somehow knows what’s wrong with Allison. He is about to ask her when Emma distracts him.

“She’s in love with you, too,” Emma assures him, releasing her side hug, to peer up at him. “She’s just afraid of being hurt and rejected. Not to mention, she’s more stubborn than I am, so, you’re going to have to work for it, you know?” Emma shrugs her shoulders.

Worm laughs. He is more than happy to work for it. “She’s worth it,” he declares. Emma grins back at him, nodding her head. “I’m such an idiot. I felt like I couldn’t have a relationship with her, be a Raider, and take care of my mom and sisters, but being away from her the last few weeks has made it abundantly clear. I’m not any good without her in my life. Everything else is falling apart without her.”

“Yes, you are an idiot,” Emma agrees, with a good-natured grin, that fades to a frown. “I’m still sore at you for hurting her, but I’m thrilled that you have come to your senses. She needs you, Russell,” Emma’s voice becomes serious, along with her expression. “Allison likes to make everyone believe she is this tough, independent woman who doesn’t need anyone, but I know better. She cares about those close to her, but she doesn’t let many people get that close to her. The fact she’s allowed herself to care about you is huge.”

Worm can’t help feeling ten feet tall and bulletproof with Emma’s words. He knew he’d hurt Allison with his words, which meant she cared enough to be hurt. He can work with this. He isn’t above begging if need be. He just needs to be able to talk to her. “Thanks, Emma, for telling me this. I know I fucked up royally, but I promise I’m going to make it up to her. What can I do to get her to forgive me?”

Emma’s expression softens. “Just be honest with her. Tell her how you feel, even if you aren’t sure what you’re feeling. Explain to her, like you did to us, that you were afraid you couldn’t handle everything, but that being without her has made you see just how much she means to you, that she is worth the effort of making it all work.”

Worm can see the wisdom of Emma’s words. He will do whatever it takes to fix this.

“Well, I guess I better get to groveling.” The room erupts into laughter as he leaves the kitchen and climbs the stairs to Allison’s room. He’s about half way up when Abigail catches up with him.

“Worm?” He stops, turning back to look down at the woman.

“Yeah?” Abigail looks worried, but then she straightens her spine, determination coming over her. She steps up next to him.

“I might be wrong, but I think I know what’s wrong with Allison.” Worm’s eye brows lift. He waits, but when she doesn’t immediately continue, he makes a motion with his hand to encourage her to get on with. “She’s pregnant.”

“What?” He is surely misunderstanding what Abigail is saying.

“Like I said, I could be wrong, but I don’t think so. Just be kind to her. If she’s anything like I’ve been during my pregnancies, she’s going to be overly emotional…volatile even. Good luck!” Abigail gives his arm a squeeze of encouragement before heading back down the stairs.

Worm’s mind is a tumultuous mess as he continues up the stairs. Abigail can’t be right. Allison would have told him. He pauses outside Allison’s room, debating on what he’s going to say. He’s rehearsed his speech in his head a hundred times over the last few weeks, but now that he is here…with what he just heard from Abigail? He can’t think of anything to say other than, ‘I’m sorry for being a fool.’Will she believe him? Will she forgive him?

He has to believe that she will. He can’t keep going on like this, not talking to her, not knowing if she’s safe and well. The worst is not being able to hold her. He must get her to forgive him, somehow, someway. Taking a deep breath, he knocks on her door and waits.

There’s no answer. He leans closer to the door, listening intently to see if he can hear any sound from inside the room, but there’s only silence from the other side of the door. He knocks again, “Allison? Baby let me in so we can talk.”

Again, he waits, but there’s no response. “Please, sugar! I’ll get on my knees and beg if you want, just please talk to me.”

Worm stands there, indecision warring within him. His heart says to give her time, let her open the door willingly, but his gut says he needs to just open the door by any means necessary. He knocks for a third time without a response.

He notices movement in the corner of his eye. Emma and Wallace are standing at the top of the stairs. He really didn’t want an audience for this, but he doesn’t have a choice. He can’t ask them to leave. He is in their home, after all. He really hopes Wallace won’t kill him for what he’s ready to do, if needed. He rolls his shoulders, preparing to kick the door in if necessary. He reaches out and grabs the knob. “Here goes everything,” he whispers as he attempts to turn the knob.

To his shock, it turns easily. She hasn’t locked the door. He pushes, gently opening the door. He steps into the room hesitantly, looking around but Allison is nowhere to be found.Is she in the bathroom?

He looks behind him, through the bedroom door to the bathroom across the hall. That door is also standing open, but no one is inside. Allison is nowhere in sight. He turns back to the bedroom.

The bed is unmade, but there aren’t any clothes scattered around like he would’ve expected. At the hotel in the Tennessee mountains, her room had looked like her suitcase had exploded and again when they’d stayed together in Denver, had been much the same.

The closet door is standing open showcasing a row of empty hangers. He walks to the dresser pulling open drawer after drawer, finding them empty. “She never unpacked her suitcase,” Emma says from the door. Worm turns to find Emma and Wallace standing just inside the room, both of them looking sad and confused at Allison’s absence.

“Where is she?” Emma and Wallace shake their heads with a shrug of their shoulders. They, too, are scanning the empty room. Worm looks back at the empty closet. Her suitcase is gone. She’s run, again. He heaves out a sigh and drops onto the unmade bed. Something rustles under him. He stands up and looks down. There’s a sheet of notebook paper lying on the bed with Allison’s handwriting on it.

Emma,

I’m going home. It’s past time to stop wallowing and get on with my life. Thank you for helping me in my time of need. I do appreciate your help and I’m sorry for leaving without a proper goodbye. I need to do this and I didn’t want to give you the opportunity to talk me out of it. I’m not strong enough to resist you especially when you’re all smart and make good points :)

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