Page 39 of And They Had a Great Fall

“How did you choose her?” Kat asked.

“I didn’t really,” he replied. “Roger did. Back when I got my first role. She’s been with me from the beginning, so I’m pretty loyal to her, even though I don’t think she likes me much. I frustrate her.” He snapped the lid on his cup and took a long sip. “I keep telling her I’m only human. I can’t be perfect all the time, but she keeps telling me I need to play a part, a character, in my public life. I don’t want to do that. Public image is one thing, but being someone else entirely.… ”

Kat studied him for a second as he set his coffee down to put on his shoes. She took a deep breath and tried to choose her words carefully. “She isn’t wrong. Your personal image has taken a hit for most of this year,” she mused. “It’s fascinating to me. You’re a business, Jake. I never thought about you that way, but you are. You’re in the business ofyou… or at least, the version of you they can sell to the public.”

“That’s one way to look at it,” Jake said and shrugged. “Seems kinda bleak. I want to focus on playing meaningful roles and letting other people take care of everything else. I don’t like to think about the business side. That’s why I have a team.”

Kat continued, “But do you have a team that respects whoyouwant to be, not just whotheywant you to be? And can thoseever be the same thing?” It was his life and his career, and she didn’t know enough to have a clear opinion, but she wondered. She’d just begun to realize he was a product. That’s what he was to everyone who made a living off Jake’s work and image. The concept intrigued her as a businessperson; as a human, it made her sad.

He stood up and checked his phone. “Good question. Not sure. Can we work on my business plan later?” he asked, winking at her. “Car is here. I gotta go.” He gave her a quick kiss and bounded out the door.

As she walked into the Path offices, Kat finally exhaled. This was her safe space, and she needed to spend a few hours in a world she knew how to navigate. She could no longer deny that she wanted to be with Jake, and that would mean stepping out of her overly controlled world. Every time she thought about it, her mouth went dry, and her heart raced, but it also made her feel more like herself than she had in years.

She’d sat down in the office when her phone chimed.

J: Hey, Garren’s hosting a cast dinner tonight, please come.

K: Are you sure? Right now? That sounds like a bad idea.

K: Hard pass.

After a small outing on a closed set had made it to Twitter, she wanted to stay in their safe, secret bubble. At least for the next few days.

J: It’s a private dinner, only eight of us. It’ll be okay.

J: Private, not secret, remember?

J: All the moments. ;)

Ugh. Against her better judgment, Kat agreed. He certainly had ways to make her say yes.

K: Fine. Text me the address. I’ll meet you there. We can come and go separately.

J: Great. I’ll send a car.

She busied herself with meetings and her endless to-do list but found herself watching the clock. Despite her reservations she couldn’t stop smiling when she thought of him. She opened her calendar to see if she could run over to the apartment to change clothes before dinner. One glance at her overloaded calendar gave her an answer. She and Emily were knee-deep in reviewing regional launch plans when she received a text letting her know the car Jake had sent was five minutes away.

“Emily, are we good? I have to leave for dinner,” she said, hitting share on the document they were working on. She glanced down at her jeans and black sweater and wished she had worn something more interesting. Her hair was pulled back into a low knot at the base of her neck—a quick hairstyle done earlier this morning, in the haze of minimal sleep. She stared at her own reflection on the video screen and sighed. When she’d dressed for the day, her itinerary did not include a dinner full of famous people.

“Yes,” Emily replied. “Happy hour with the team again?”

“No, with Jake,” she said, packing up her bag. It was nice to be honest with someone, and she trusted Emily to keep her relationship with Jake secret, or at least private. She tried on Jake’s language, and it made sense in her mind. The normalcy of heading to dinner after a day at work made her almost forgot she was in Copenhagen, without Becca, living a temporary life. She indulged herself, leaning into a brief, alternative reality, where she’d made different choices living a different life.

Emily smiled at her. “Oh, good for you. You aren’t ever coming home, are you?” she asked, her voice light and teasing.

“I’ll be back in a few days,” Kat replied, her voice flat as her mind shifted from her alternative reality to the present day.

“Right. That was a fast trip. We’re good here. You should take your last few days with Jake.” Kat went to protest, but Emily jumped in and spoke over her. “Kat seriously, I’ll text you if we need you. Just keep your phone onandcharged.”

Kat knew Emily was teasing. She rolled her eyes. “I’ll consider it.”

She didn’t want to count the number of days before she left. More than that, she didn’t want to plan every second. She just wanted to be. Be with Jake.

Once Kat entered the restaurant, the host wasted no time, escorting her to a door markedPRIVATE. The door opened to a room bursting with wild energy, a decibel that sounded like a thousand voices chattering at once. A waiter held a tray in front of her and she grabbed a glass of red. She assessed at least twenty people in the room, a far cry from the eight Jake had promised. She reminded herself that Jake was trying, but he was nothing if not inexact.

She scanned the room until her eyes landed on Jake. He was holding court with a group of people, some of whom she recognized. His face was dancing as his arm gestured wildly. She hung back and observed him in his element, so at ease, so effortlessly charming, that he quite literally lit up the entire room. Up until this trip, she’d only thought of him as scattered, funny, emotional Jake. She was seeing him in a new light for the smart, dynamic, magnetic man that he was. She couldn’t take her eyes off him.

As he hit the crescendo of his story, the group erupted in laughter. His eyes moved past his audience, and a smile lit up hisentire face. He gestured for her to come over, and all of a sudden everyone’s eyes were on her. Her hands shook ever so slightly as she took a sip of wine and walked over. He stepped toward her, grabbed her hand, and gave her a kiss on the lips.

---