Page 36 of Waiting for a Bright New Future

“It’s important to have a go.” The Topics Chair was insistent. “Even if you only speak for twenty seconds, you’ve made a start on your public speaking journey.”

“No, I . . .”

Bright new futures don’t come sailing towards cowards.

There could be no argument with Sandra in this public setting. He glanced at the list on the sheet of paper being offered to him. “Keeping fit. I’ll talk about that.”

Sandra gave him a little round of applause. Stuart prayed for the fire alarm to go off before his turn.

Twenty minutes later his name was called and he walked to the front of the room to polite clapping.

He looked at the audience and they looked back at him. He couldn’t think of anything to say. He knew nothing about keep fit. It was a stupid subject to have chosen. John caught his eye from the back of the room and smiled encouragingly, the teacher and pupil roles reversed. All the faces in the audience were still staring at him, waiting for something foolish to trip from his lips. He’d known he wouldn’t be able to do this and he couldn’t. Jayne had been right. He threw an apologetic glance at John and returned to his seat.

He didn’t even have the confidence to completely abandon the meeting and go home. His cheeks felt red hot when he touched them and there was a tremor in his hands.

The rest of the speakers passed in a blur.

“Do not let that experience put you off.” John shook his hand at the end of the meeting. “We all freeze from time to time. You’ll be better when you’ve had time to prepare what you’re going to say in advance. We meet again in a month. I’ll put you down for a short ice-breaker speech. Prepare five minutes on whatever you’re passionate about.”

“I don’t think so. It’s obviously not for me.”

“Think about it,” John urged. “You inspired me as a teacher and I want to do the same in return. At least think about it.”

There seemed to be no way out of agreeing to consider a short, prepared speech for the next meeting. As soon as Stuart was back in the car the list of excuses that he could give John began forming in his mind.

Absolutely not! You should embrace this opportunity, bro.

He ignored his sister.

* * *

The contents of William’s chocolate box diminished as Stuart learned the moves to one of the Blackberries hits, necessitating lots of leg-kicking and arm-waving. TheWorld at Onebecame their daily lunchtime listening. Sometimes, Stuart suspected that Florence wasn’t properly concentrating, but she usually managed to answer any questions he asked her.

Despite still feeling like a wooden puppet put together by an amateur carpenter, Stuart was enjoying the energy Florence swept into his life. Then she upped the ante.

“You can choose three chocolates at once if you join in with the singing on any track,” she said after another successful dance session, her face glowing with enthusiasm.

He refused. Point blank. One of the last things he’d done at the behest of his mother was audition for the church choir. They’d turned him down and his mother died soon after. He had no confidence in his singing. He would rather face that expectant audience at speakers’ club than sing.

“Besides,” he said. “The chocolates are nearly all gone.”

Florence spoke regularly with Shirley’s partner, Jacob, about her daughter and grandchildren. Apparently, Shirley was using less and there was some improvement in the state of the youngsters. When he put Eunice and Shayne on the phone to Florence at weekends, she always came away smiling.

Stuart, meanwhile, paid great attention to the calendar. Robert and George had given him twelve months and the time was flowing like sand through open fingers. In eight months, he’d have to wave goodbye to Florence, find a cheap hovel and more income. His earnings plus Florence’s rent covered his current expenditure but that combination wouldn’t work going forward when he would have to pay rent himself. And, although she knew the score, would Jayne really still want him when he was impecunious? And on top of all that, he had either a watertight excuse, or a speech to prepare.

Chapter Twenty

The other date creeping closer on the calendar was Jayne’s birthday. Stuart still had no idea what present he would buy. Whenever his mind was free to roam, the problem bubbled to the surface.

“What do women like for their birthdays?” He was cycling alongside one of the women on the Sunday club ride and he tried to phrase the question casually.

Jennifer glanced from the road to him and grinned inquisitively. “What sort of woman?”

“Fifties, a neighbour.”

“Flowers, chocolates.”

He frowned. “Something that looks like I’ve put thought in?”

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