Page 64 of Wolf's Whisper

Chapter 16. The Lake

The stench of death followed us even after we left the battlefield. It was almost like it got soaked into our very beings. Or it could just be that we were all covered in blood, dirt, and sweat. Maybe just that.

In any case, I was more than happy to leave the pile of dead bodies behind. Just thinking about all the lives we took made my stomach turn. Especially when I remembered the face of my kill. The life I stole.

I shuddered and pushed the memory down. Deep, deep down, locking it in an imaginary box that I buried far away in my conscious. I couldn't afford to feel guilty. I couldn't let myself think about what I’d actually done. It would destroy me. Pretending it hadn't happened and running away from the problem was so much easier.

So I just focused on placing one foot in front of the other, moving along with the pack.

"I stink," Darren muttered, pulling up his nose as he wafted fresh air under his armpits. Elegant.

"Death isn't the best perfume, no," Danny agreed, sniffing her own shirt and almost retching from the stench.

JP nodded, picking at a spot of dried blood. "M-Maybe we should make a slight d-detour to the lake?"

"I agree with JP. At this rate, you'll all kill me with your stench. Or I'll kill myself with my own," Ashleigh mumbled, gagging as she pinched the bridge of her nose.

Interesting how after the haze of killing wore off and the battle became a repressed memory, the reek of death seemed to bother us more and more. I guess we finally had space in our heads to worry about it.

"A dip in the water would be great. I can smell all of you and I don't mean that as a compliment in any way whatsoever," I weighed in, earning a glare from Darren.

"Oi, I'm not... Oh, who am I kidding. I stink," he shrugged, waving fresh air to his face and retching as there was no clean air around us. We were just one smelly carnival of death. Now that's something you don't think often. But joking about it was easier than dealing with the fact that it was at least, partially, true.

Regan pointed to our left. "We can detour for a night. Lake should be up ahead."

Stupid ambush. If they hadn't attacked us, we might've been able to get out of the forest by nightfall. Instead, we were caught in the web of trees for at least another day. At this rate, I would never even lay eyes on the Winter Stone.

"Aspen? You okay with us rerouting?" Ashleigh asked her brother, nudging him out of his slump.

"Huh? Yeah, sure," he muttered bleakly, his eyes glazing over almost immediately. Damn, he was really taking it hard. He seemed to be having a much harder time shaking off our battle. I wondered if he had been able to follow my train of thought while I was under his Alpha's influence. Had he felt how murderous and conflicted I'd been?

I needed to talk to him about that. I needed to find out if he had seen my darkest of thoughts.

"Are we setting up camp and staying another night close to the lake?" I inquired, trying to think up a plan on how to get some alone time with Aspen. It was freaking hard to get some privacy with the whole group being so tight-knit.

Regan peered up into the sky, scratching the slight beard he’d grown over the past few days. "We should."

The whole group collectively groaned. Clearly, I wasn't the only one who was ready to get out of the forest. I was dying for a long view, unrestricted sun on my skin, and sitting down without branches poking my butt.

"A-After tonight, we should be out of the f-forest, r-right?"

The whole group looked hopefully at Regan and sighed in relief when he nodded. Thank the spirits. Only one more night trapped between the trees and then we'd get a change of scenery. Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.

Uncharacteristically, the trek to the next camping spot was rather quiet and I was certain that everyone was processing the events of the morning. It was unbelievable that everything had transpired in such a short amount of time. It was as if time seemed to pass differently in the forest. Maybe it did. We wouldn't be the first group of travellers who never made it out of Aladwin or got completely derailed.

A memory from long ago flashed through my mind. I must've been eight or nine, but I remembered a group of men appearing from the forest with thick, uncombed beards. Later, my grandpappy explained that they'd been lost in the forest for months and had warned me to always keep a clear mind when inside the woods.

I had to admit, my mind had been heavy and cloudy ever since Aspen killed Cece. Well, Chesca. I kept using the wrong name. Chesca. Chesca. Chesca.

A refreshing swim would be good to clear my mind from the latest fog. Witnessing my first kill, feeling Aspen's command, becoming possessed by his Alpha, and having my own kill all in the span of a couple of days, were not exactly events that would keep my mind healthy.

The clearing we chose to set up camp was almost as depressing as our campsite before the cave. But it beat sleeping in the mud. At least I'd have a tent to myself. Ish. If I didn't share with Aspen or Ashleigh, that is. But the idea of crawling in a cold tent by myself definitely wasn't as appealing as being cuddled by either of the twins. It wouldn't be the worst thing to be snuggled. And we wouldn't be sleeping next to Danny and her men. I was sure they could use some privacy of their own.

I wondered how their sleeping arrangements were before I joined the group. Did Aspen and Ashleigh always bunk together? When Aspen's first mate was still alive, did she sleep in between the twins?

Jealousy twisted my stomach in a tight knot at the thought of anyone else sleeping with Ashleigh. Dear heavens, I hoped she didn't cuddle with my woman. I'd kill her all over again.

Oh wow, that was a possessive thought. I should really clear my head and think about something else. Something like Darren's food. At least, I hoped he would cook. His food was to die for. Not literally die, but close enough. Yup, something was definitely wrong with me. Instead of freaking out about all the fighting, my near-death experience, or Aspen's solemnness, I seemed to be back to my sarcastic self and making jokes about death.