Page 69 of Maid in America

“Whoa.” He seemed stunned by her sudden loss of skill. “I’ll get it.” As he brushed past her, he muttered, “No more bending over foryou.”

After he retrieved the gold ball, he bent over to put it in front of her, wiggling his own butt, coaxing an involuntary laugh from her. The simple act was enough to draw her out of her suffocating thoughts and back into the moment.

“Hmmm. I see what you mean about it being distracting.” She cupped one of his jean-covered cheeks and, after a squeeze, pushed him out of her way.

As she tapped the ball again, softer this time, Barrett spoke. “When you’re not on the GPA tour circuit, what sort of trouble do you get up to?”

“Well,” she eyed the course, trying to calculate the best angle, “As you may have noticed at Nussbaum’s house, I’m a bit of a reality television connoisseur.”

“Well,” Barrett jokingly tossed his putter into the real shrubs nearby and started to walk away, “thanks for the date. This was fun. Buh-bye.”

“Why does everyone say that? They wouldn’t have so many reality shows if people didn’t watch them. They’re so fun!”

“Watching angsty housewives slap each other around is not my idea of entertaining.”

“Oh, stop. They’re not all like that. I know a fewyoumight even like.”

Chastity tapped the ball. It approached the hole and whirled around the plastic outer edge without going in. She cursed under her breath.

“I highly doubt that.” He scribbled their scores on the notepad as she gave the ball the two-inch tap it needed to go in.

“Finally.”

“Okay, besides your terrible taste in television, what else do you like?”

“I love animals. I volunteer at the shelter a lot. There’s this Mastiff up there, Molly, that I’m inlovewith. I wish I could adopt her.”

“Why can’t you?”

“Money. Plus, I don’t thinkRabbit Runallows pets. Although, the people living in that apartment before me were clearly livinglikeanimals.”

“No kidding. That place was a fuckin’ zoo.” Barrett laughed. “Animals, huh? I can get behind dogs, but what about other things? Like, you aren’t into snakes and tarantulas and stuff, are you?”

He hit the ball just enough to roll it in. When he looked up, he noticed Chastity with her head cocked to the side like a German Shepard.

“What’s wrong with snakes and tarantulas?”

“C’mon, really? They’re snakes and spiders. People’s two most common phobias. What good are they other than to scare the crap outta people?”

“Snakes keep pests under control. They help prevent the spread of diseases like Lyme, Lepto, and Hantavirus. Spiders do the same thing. They’re also good for soil aeration and, like bees, most don’t harm humans unless they feel threatened.”

Barrett blinked repeatedly, unsure if he was dreaming. “So, you are saying you likeeveryanimal.”

“Not all.” She smiled. “Can’t stand Pomeranians. They’re like feather dusters that bite.” She giggled. “I love all types of animals. Wouldn’t want them all aspets, but everything has an important part to play in this world.”

“So, are you gonna freak out if I squash a spider?”

“No.” She laughed. “I get it. They’re freaky, and most people don’t know the good ones from the dangerous ones. I’m just saying I like everything because it all…belongs. It all has a purpose.”

The father of the family behind them cleared his throat, impatiently waiting for his family’s turn. He gave them a flat smile and squinted his eyes uncomfortably. “Can we play through?”

“Sure! Sorry,” Chastity said.

They stepped aside, allowing the two small children to squabble over who would go first. The man stared at Chastity for a moment too long, and Barrett flashed him a sharp “Fuck off” glare before draping his muscular arm over her bare shoulders.

The man turned around just in time to watch his son swing and miss the ball.

Chastity leaned up toward Barrett’s ear. “Pfft, look at these amateurs. This guy with the beer gut and the two boys, he’s definitely got a tattoo he regrets, like a half-sleeve portrait of Pee-Wee Herman on his bicep or something.”

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