I clenched my jaw and shook my head. “Physically, no. He just wasn’t there when we needed him to be. But my mama, she took her vows seriously and stuck by him, for better or worse. When he found Jesus, he expected everyone to just forget about the things he’d done while drunk. Becoming a Christian was his get out of jail free card.”
Ari placed a hand on my forearm, quietly encouraging me to continue.
“There were no apologies. Nothing. And it just kinda soured me on the whole idea of religion.” The back of my neck grew warm under the weight of my confession. I’d just admitted something to her that even Bailey didn’t know about.
Reed men weren’t exactly known for their vulnerability. If I was honest, I wasn’t sure I wanted to take it up as a hobby.
Milo stretched until his paws dangled over my hand and gave me the side-eye, before going to town on one of my fingers like it was a teething ring. It was enough to zap me out of my funk. “Anyway, I don’t necessarily have the best judgment, so take from that what you will.”
“You don’t think you’re a good judge of character?” Ari asked, observing me with a small frown.
“It’s not a matter of what I think. My track record proves that I shouldn’t trust myself.” I forced a brittle laugh, wishing I could go back to discussing my ridiculous theories on how Helen had sustained her life-altering injury.
“To me, it seems you trust your own judgment just fine. It’s other people’s you seem to have trouble with.”
“How do you figure?”
“Well, take your injury, for example. You were so confident in your own judgment that you didn’t trust the call to stay on first.”
“Bit of an expert on baseball now, are we?” I teased, remembering how red she’d gotten when I found the magazine in her bed.
She shrugged and held a finger out to Milo. He released me from the grip of his razor-sharp teeth to happily tackle his new target. “Well, I mean, I watched the footage and read the articles, so I’m thinking ESPN is going to come knocking any day now.”
“You’re screwing with me—you watched that? Why?” I mashed my lips together, struggling to keep up the appearance of being annoyed.
Ari shook her head, giggling at my expense. “What? I do have interests beyond Georgia’s travel magazines. Is it so surprising that I might want to know more about you? A girl has gotta learn sometime.”
“Let me guess, you thought asking me directly would be too forward?” I asked with mock concern. “Better to keep it tucked away under your pillow, yeah?”
“Please. You would have had me thinking you were the best thing since—quick, name a great baseball player—” She squirmed away with a yelp when I squeezed her thigh, earning us dirty looks from the puppies that had been dozing nearby.
“Stop! I’m kidding,” she panted, struggling to escape the blanket of dogs on her legs. “You never bring it up. When I do, you change the subject. I didn’t think it was up for discussion, so I did my own research, okay?”
“Oh yeah?” My mouth tipped up in a smirk. “What else did you learn during your little fact-finding mission?”
Ari rolled her eyes and lifted her index finger. “Let’s see—one, Killian Reed is extremely conceited. It’s a wonder his shirts manage to fit over his big head”—
“Conceited?” I struck her side this time, tickling along her ribs, and reveling in the sound of her laughter.
“Please,” she begged through heavy-lidded eyes, grabbing hold of my wrist. Something passed between us. She moved closer, no longer smiling.
I wanted to reach out to grasp her shirt in my fist, tugging at the material until her body was flush with mine. Instead, I pulled back just as she lifted her chin. It wasn’t that I didn’t feel the significance of the moment.
It was just too soon.
Baby steps.
Ari released my wrist and tucked her fingers into my palm. A sudden jolt passed through me when she tipped her face up to mine, looking at me like maybe she believed I could save the world.
“You didn’t let me finish. Killian Reed is cocky and—”
“Pretty sure you covered that one,” I murmured, unable to take my eyes off her mouth. So damn beautiful. An electric current of lust coursed through my body, weakening my resolve. She was wrong. I didn’t trust my judgment at all when it came to her.
“Did I?” She looked up at me from under her lashes. “Well, here’s one hot off the press. I’m starting to think he just might be my best friend.”
True Northwas going to discharge me sometime in the next week, but at the rate I was moving, I wouldn’t get around to telling her how I felt until sometime next century. Screw baby steps. It was bottom of the ninth, with the bases loaded and two outs.
Go big or go home time.