Page 142 of Wait For It

Killian lifted me up and back onto the bed before standing. I slipped the robe around my shoulders like a cape and gave him a drowsy smile, only to be met with a distant expression.

Without saying a word, he walked over to sit in an armchair near the windows, watching me with a strangely intense expression.

My skin was still buzzing from his mouth, making coherent speech impossible.

His eyes went hooded as they moved down my body, but he shook his head and ran a hand roughly over his face, clearly trying to mask his emotions.

To hide.

A blush rose up my neck. I swallowed, wondering if perhaps I’d done it wrong. The church-funded health class hadn’t exactly covered a man kissing a woman there.

Believe me, I would have remembered that.

“Do you want to come back to bed?” I finally asked, my voice uneven. My nerves were frayed. I felt I was dangerously close to another crying spell, but refrained, awaiting his answer.

“I can’t.”

“Why?” I pushed up onto my knees, facing him with a sigh. “Look, that was a first for me. If you don’t tell me what I’m doing wrong, I can’t fix my mistakes. I can’t be better for you.”

The muscle in his jaw tightened. “You think you did it wrong? Christ, Ari. You are so fucking perfect when you come apart. It’s taking everything in me not to come over there and fuck you until you’re screaming the entire goddamn hotel down.”

Killian’s words conjured up a variety of erotic images. I shivered, painfully aroused by the thought of him performing any number of them. “Is it because you don’t have a condom?”

His deep voice was laced with regret as he quietly admitted, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

There was a war raging behind those eyes, a hesitancy that left me more than a little confused. The church believed men were created to take and women to endure. Killian had given me pleasure but gotten nothing in return.

“You’re afraid because I’m a virgin.” I wanted him to have me. Given what little knowledge I possessed on lovemaking, it wouldn’t necessarily be pleasurable for me, but I was willing to endure any pain if it made him feel good.

“What?”

His glacial eyes snapped back to mine. “But the bruises—I thought he—”

I resisted the urge to bow my head because I was no longer that girl. I’d taken down one monster armed only with a lie and another, armed only with the truth. Maybe bravery had never been about making myself unafraid, but in standing up to evil with empty hands and a wounded body.

“No. You gave me the courage to fight back, Killian.” My heart pounded as I studied his dark expression, trying to read his thoughts. “You—it was always meant to be you.”

He got up and moved to stand at the side of the bed, looking almost guilty. “Before I go any further, I want you to know that tonight was about you, and I wasn’t planning on this, okay?”

My eyebrow shot up. “Um, okay?”

He produced several foil packets from his back pocket, his voice suddenly strangled as he admitted, “I had Dean get me condoms when he was picking up food, but I swear, I didn’t plan on any of this happening tonight. I just wanted to be prepared.”

I crawled forward and pressed my lips to the corner of his mouth before shrugging the robe off again. His gaze dropped between us, leaving my body humming in anticipation.

“Make love to me, Killian,” I murmured, shivering as his fingers skimmed over my breasts and belly, carefully avoiding the bruises along my torso.

“Come here, girl.” He lowered his mouth over mine. His large hands pulled my hips flush to him, kneading the flesh of my bottom.

I raked my fingers through his dark hair, surrendering to his touch and tasting myself on his tongue. He sucked my upper lip between his teeth as he lowered me onto the bed.

My nipples rubbed against his chest, the friction sending jolts of pleasure to my core. When he pulled back to remove his jeans, I made a mewling sound of protest, already reaching for him again.

“Patience,” he demanded, his voice rough.

I pushed up onto my elbows, watching him unashamedly stroke himself before tearing the foil square with his teeth. He rolled the condom down his thick length, his hungry gaze never once leaving mine.

He would forever be the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

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