Page 103 of Through the Water

“Does it fucking feel like I don’t want that?” He growled, grinding his hard length against the lower part of my belly. “If you’d let me, I’d fuck you up against this wall right now. But you’re not a normal girl. Not to me.”

There it was again.

Two words that felt like a judgment.

“Why?” I stifled a moan as my hips arched forward, instinctively seeking the friction of him. “Because of my brain injury? The seizure? What is it that makes me so abnormal to you?”

My body’s response was foreign but not unwelcome. If sex wasn’t meant to be pleasurable, then why did the mere feel of Killian leave me needy with want?

“Christ,” he muttered with a ragged breath, tightening his hold on my hip. “I ache for you, Ari, in a way that I’ve never experienced with anyone else. But our first time together won’t be in a dirty hallway—”

It wasn’t that dirty.

“Please,” I begged, throwing in some very unladylike moans. I didn’t want to stop, not when it felt so good. Killian caught my hands as they inched their way down his torso, quickly pinning them above my head with a low growl.

Sensing that I wasn’t about to be deterred, he dipped down and let his full lips brush against mine. His tongue moved in all the ways I wished his body would, tangled and twisted around me.

There was something incredibly sensual in the way he held my hands against the wall, guiding our movements using only his mouth. His stubble roughly scraped along my jaw, his lips devouring my earlier doubts.

Killian was mine—he’d always been meant to be mine.

I hissed out a breath when his teeth connected with my throat, nipping and sucking the sensitive flesh. When his tongue swept over the same area, I was painfully aware of what it meant to be ‘turned on.’

Everything felt buzzy and electric. Like I was entirely made of nerves.

I rocked forward and struggled against him, needing to ground myself, but he refused to budge. My nipples peaked against my bra. I was convinced I needed his mouth there too.

My lids fluttered open, and I watched in wonder as his bicep flexed just inches from my face. All that strength, yet he was holding back, his grip on my wrists just enough to keep me still. The blood left my limbs, sending a flood of warmth between my legs.

Killian released my hands and pulled back, his blue-gray eyes drowsy and unfocused as they moved down over my face. “Did I hurt you?” he panted.

“No—why’d you stop?” I whined, which was entirely out of character.

He let out a rough bark of laughter, his chest rising and falling as he fought to catch his breath. “Because you’ve never done this before.”

I snapped my mouth shut, something that only seemed to make him laugh harder. As the nerve endings in my body were still sparking like live wires, I didn’t exactly share his amusement.

Killian released another unsteady breath before backing toward the opposite wall. “I’m not gonna lie—I’ve been rock hard for the better part of the afternoon, seeing you in those leggings and imagining this. But you deserve better than a quick fuck outside of a bathroom. Let me give you that… please.”

“Okay,” I whispered, feeling frustrated but also slightly pleased that being near me had affected him physically.

His eyes moved to mine as he bent to retrieve his crutch from the floor. “I can tell you’re in your head right now, but I promise you, this isn’t me changing my mind, girl. I just wanna slow things down and take my time with you.”

I pressed my fingers to my swollen lips, fighting against arousal and the sudden urge to take another meandering glance at the noticeable bulge in the front of his sweats—for scientific reasons.

Instead, I corralled my wild libido and nodded. “What do you say we go introduce ourselves to those longnose killifish?”

We exited to find Tsega waiting just outside the door with her arms crossed over her chest. Her lips pursed in amusement as she took in our dishevelment. “I didn’t realize they had more tanks back there. Anyway, everyone’s on the bus. We’re just waiting on you.”

“Yeah, I’ve got to head back to my condo,” Killian rushed to explain before turning to face me. “Thanks for letting me tag along. I was thinking—if you’re up for it—I could maybe have you for dinner. Take you to dinner, I mean! Next Saturday?”

His slip of the tongue set off another explosive chain of sensations within my body, and I ended up blurting, “Why not tomorrow? I’m free tomorrow!”

A flash of something like hunger darkened his expression. Instead of another pleasure-inducing kiss, Killian just brushed his lips over my cheek before pulling back. “Next Saturday, it is.”

I observed his hasty retreat with a thoughtful frown, wondering if there would ever be a day when he wasn’t running away from me.

Tsega watched him go before shifting her gaze back to me. “Seems like you’ve made quite the impression on him.”