Page 24 of Protector

“Are you drunk?” I asked, just as he snapped, “I’ve been here the entire time!”

We both fell silent, taking in the other’s admission.

“Maybe I am drunk.” He moved closer, and I stepped back until I came into contact with the brick siding.

“Why?” I whispered.

He lowered his forehead to mine, and I inhaled, breathing in the familiar scent of leather and cigarette smoke, along with the overwhelming stench of hard liquor on his breath.

“Why am I drunk, or why have I been here?” His arm hooked around my waist, drawing me up against his body. “Either way, it’s the same answer. You.”

His hand was like a vise against my injuries, the agonizing pressure stealing the breath from my lungs. Mistaking my gasp for something I was no longer capable of feeling; he tilted my face up and sucked my bottom lip in between his teeth.

So fuckin’ good.

I jerked away, my head connecting painfully with the bricks at my back as I fought my way out of the cage he’d put me in. I thrust my knee into his groin, and he stumbled back with a groan.

“Don’t touch me,” I croaked, before doubling over with a ragged breath. With the waves of nausea came the flashbacks and an overwhelming sense of helplessness. My throat tightened, and I clawed at it, fighting to get air into my lungs.

“It’s okay, darlin’.” Jamie ground out through clenched teeth, before crawling over to where I knelt against the cold concrete.

Each gasp and wheeze was another sharp reminder that I wasn’t okay. I was never going to be okay.

He kept his distance but gripped my wrists in one hand. “I got you, princess. You’re safe now. You’re safe.”

Jamie had been my safe place for as long as I could remember, but that had been before.

Before Hawk’s fists.

Before Manny’s taunts.

Before Cobra’s mouth.

Even with the sweatshirt between us, my skin sizzled from the heat of him. Hands that had held mine as I brought our daughter into the world were now searing and unwelcome against my body.

“Let me go,” I whispered, keeping my gaze averted. “Please.”

He dropped my hands immediately and rocked back onto his heels. “Jesus Christ, darlin’. What’d they do to you?”

I pulled the sleeves of the sweatshirt down over my hands. “It doesn’t matter—”

“It does, goddammit.” His voice broke, and he swiped the back of his hand over his eyes. “Please tell me.”

“Are you crying?” The full weight of his grief settled over me, leaving me desperate for the cigarette I’d lost in the scuffle.

I wondered what it meant that Jamie was no longer the leader of Silent Phoenix. If his plan had been to abandon the club and come back home, then maybe my father was right.

My girls would never be safe.

As long as he was here, we would be vulnerable to another attack.

“Should’ve been here to protect you.”

Three years ago, I’d begged him to stay.

For me.

For the girls.

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