Page 5 of Protector

“But it hurts.”

She nodded as she picked up the slip and placed it under the running water before coming back over to me. “It does. In order to change, we have to endure the pain. It’s your body’s way of telling you to let go.”

She handed me the warm washcloth. “And you’re much braver than you give yourself credit for. Women like us, Celia? We’re like that bonfire we built last summer. Beautiful to look at, but we can’t be contained or controlled. Once you realize that, my dear, you’ll see how powerful you truly are.”

More tears fell onto my cheeks. “I don’t want to feel like this.”

She knelt in front of me and wiped them away with her fingers. “You won’t feel like this forever. The pain will lessen, but you won’t forget it. You’ll take that hurt and use it to become stronger, and heaven help anyone who gets in your way.”

* * *

The sky was still dark when I woke up, in the same position; slumped against the bathroom wall next to the shower. My right eye opened to no more than a slit, but it was enough for me to see that the window was sitting wide open.

The curtains flapped against the cold breeze; their rustling enough to have roused me from my stupor. I stared into the dark, waiting for my tormenters to reappear.

How had I ever believed we were safe?

I tried to straighten, and my tongue connected with the back of my front teeth, sending a jolt of pain throughout my body. The vice around my belly tightened, and I bore down with a guttural groan before blacking out.

The next time I opened my eyes, the sky was tinged with red and pink, just like the pool of blood surrounding me.

The outer edge had begun to congeal into something resembling gelatin, and I gently touched it with my big toe.

The sticky mess spread along the grout lines in the tile, looking like outstretched fingers, reaching toward the door for help.

Help that would never come.

My lips were sealed together with a combination of dried blood and vomit, and I tried shifting my jaw from side to side to loosen them, but it was no use.

Panic bubbled up in my chest, along with another round of nausea. My stomach muscles cramped up, and I retched onto the tile. The force reopened the wounds around my mouth, prying my lips apart and sending fresh streams of blood and vomit down my chin.

The bitter taste of bile lingered in my mouth, and I stared longingly at the faucet above the claw-foot tub before sinking back down to the floor in exhaustion.

I just needed to rest for a minute, and then I’d crawl over for a drink. With a grunt, I pushed myself up onto my forearms and began inching forward.

My body was a mess of tender flesh and broken bones; even the smallest movements left me clinging to consciousness with all the strength I had left.

The girls.

I dragged myself away from the tub and toward the door before remembering my father’s pleading.

Celia, baby, open the door!

They were safe now.

My back ached, and my head throbbed to the point that I was seeing double, but that didn’t stop me from reaching up to pull a towel down from the bar on the wall. I wadded it up between my legs and closed my eyes again.

Endure the pain.

Low voices carried through the open window before moving inside the house.

They were back.

“No.” With a moan, I rolled onto my side and searched for a weapon. They’d taken my gun; I was sure of it. The only comforting thought was that my girls were safe and would never see their mother like this.

I wouldn’t live through another assault, but I wasn’t going down without a fight this time. I lightly bit down on my tongue to keep from crying out as I pulled myself across the tile, leaving more blood in my wake.

The mirror above the sink had shattered when Cobra threw my head into it, littering the floor with bits of glass. The smaller shards embedded in my skin as I moved over them, but I managed to snag a larger, jagged piece to tuck away in my hand.

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