Page 57 of Through The Woods

PD shook his head. “No way, Neve. I’m not letting you shove something into my nose.”

I’d grabbed the Neti Pot, along with some honey straws I saw in the checkout line. I’d read somewhere that local honey could help with allergies and with all of PD’s sneezing and carrying on, I was willing to try anything at this point.

Him? Not so much.

The front door opened and I turned expectantly. I quickly tried to hide my disappointment when I realized that it was only Twitch. I really needed to discuss things with Charm—sooner rather than later—I was like a rubber band that was about to snap.

“How’s it hangin’, kid?”

I pointed to PD. “Twitch, tell him to suck it up and let me fix his allergies.”

Twitch came over and took the box from my hand. “Oh, PD—this is nothin’. I use one myself from time to time.”

I looked at him in surprise before nodding authoritatively. “Good. See? Nothing to worry about. What do you have to lose?”

PD poured two fingers of Jameson into the glass in front of him and then downed it. “Fuck—alright. But only Neve is allowed in there.”

Rooster’s booming laugh filled the room. “Fat chance of that, fucker. I’m getting a front row seat to this.”

Twitch rubbed his hands together. “I can give you some pointers. You okay with that, kid?”

I grinned mischievously over at PD. “The more the merrier.”

PD flipped me off and stomped up the stairs. “Let’s get this shit over with.”

The two men gleefully followed him up, while I stayed back to warm the water. I hadn’t been sure if tap water was okay or not, so I’d grabbed a case of bottled water before we left the store. I warmed it up and added the salt before carefully walking upstairs.

We gathered around the sink in PD’s bathroom as I read over the instructions. Twitch gave a few suggestions, but PD just stood frozen with the pot in his hands.

“Um, PD? You have to put it in your nose and lean over,” I offered, but he didn’t move.

I was going to have to distract him to calm his nerves. “So, how’d you get the name PD? What does it stand for?”

His features relaxed and he gave me a slow smile. “It uh- well, it means, Pussy Detective. Because—”

Rooster cut him off with a loud chuckle. “Oh hell no it doesn’t. Nice try. It stands for Pollen Detector. Charm said he could sniff out all the pollen in Colorado.”

A vein bulged on PD’s forehead and I patted his arm. “If you try this and it works, then you’re free to call yourself PD: Pussy Detective again. Imagine what Ali will think.”

He inserted the tip of the pot into his nose and leaned over, breathing through his mouth, as the saltwater flowed from his other nostril. Once he exhaled enough to clear the one side, we reheated more water and did the other side, all of us gathered around like anxious schoolgirls awaiting fresh gossip.

“So?” I asked, once we finished.

He nodded. “It didn’t suck. And I can breathe through my nose—which is pretty fucking awesome.”

I grinned widely as Rooster hip-checked me on his way to the sink. “My turn.”