Page 30 of Through The Woods

He looked out over the ledge. “That you made it. You get another chance—a chance to do things right.”

I was taken aback. His response was unexpected, to say the least. “You’ve made a lot of mistakes?”

Twitch stubbed the cigarette out on the sole of his boot before tossing it into a small metal bucket near the corner of the ledge. He caught my stare. “Fires. If you’re gonna light up, make sure to throw the butts into one of these metal bins or else the whole fucking forest’ll go up.”

I nodded and waited for him to elaborate on his cryptic ‘second chance’ message, while also appreciating his Smokey Bear mindset. He went back to staring off into the distance though, so I cleared my throat. “Um, have you made a lot of mistakes?”

He blinked and then looked back over, as if just remembering I was still here. “Kid, you and me? We’re cut from the same cloth. The greatest enemy we’ll ever face is ourselves—” He stopped talking and eyed me closer before amending, “Well, most of the time our greatest enemy is staring at us in the mirror.”

It hit too close to home, leaving me defensive. “How are we the same?”

He gestured between us. “Kid, a user can spot another user from a mile away. It’s like a fucking neon sign flashing over your head.”

I mulled over his words while chewing on my lower lip. To be honest, his words stung a bit. I knew that I hadn’t even been sober a full week, but I really felt like I already looked different—healthier.

Twitch reached over and patted my hand gently. “Don’t take it personally, kid. I’ve fallen off the wagon more times than I can count. What matters is that I’ve woken up the morning after, watched the sunrise, and got my ass back on it.”

I shook my head confidently, even as my teeth continued to work on my lip. “I’m not going to fall off. That’s not an option for me.”

He laughed so hard that he had to lean over and clutch his thighs. “That’s a good one, kid. Jesus, you almost had me goin’ for a second there. I hope, for your sake, that you’re right. You better be prepared for when the shit hits the fan though.”

I shook my head again, and reiterated, this time with a little more anger. “No. I refuse to fail. He’s expecting that. I’m going to prove him…and you wrong.”

He pulled the pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit up another one before offering the pack to me. I shook my head and he took a couple of drags before responding. “Who’s expecting you to fail? And what was your poison? That’s telling, you know.”

I pulled the sleeves of the sweatshirt down until they covered my hands, stalling. I hadn’t meant to tell him about my plan to prove Charm wrong. “Uh…it was coke.”

He nodded slowly. “And the man expecting you to fail?”

“Charm. He doesn’t want me here, but I don’t have anywhere else to go. I have to make this work. My boyf—well, ex-boyfriend tried to kill me and my parents are—” My words were cut off by a strangled sob and it took me a minute to regain my composure. “I—I need this to work.”

The sun began to rise and conversation between the two of us stopped momentarily. I focused all of my energy on the pink and purple sky; closing my eyes briefly as the sun crested, blinding me.

Twitch took my hand in his and my eyes fluttered open. “Have you taken the time to work through those emotions while sober, kid?”

I blinked against the tears and looked away, but he persisted. “If you’re set on proving the asshole wrong and not relapsing, you need to take the time to properly grieve your dead. Work through the shit, so you can move on.”

He was right.

I knew it.

I just couldn’t bear to think of that night.

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