Page 24 of Master Vidar & Vali

I kissed the top of her head in thanks for her kind words, but she was wrong. “When I dream, I’m back there but the attack and the event get mixed up. I think I’m fighting to save the kids rather than myself. I lash out and it’s hard to wake me. I won’t risk you.”

“I understand.”

It sounded like she really did.

Chapter Ten

Zara

For the dozenth time, I rolled over and stared out the window. I knew I should get up. Maybe coffee would help me get motivated, maybe a walk around the property or a workout in the gym. Unfortunately, the lethargy that had plagued me for days had a death grip on my soul. The days were beginning to blend together, and so were my excuses for inaction.

It had been three days since my world had been tipped on its side by a night of life-changing sex. Three nights exactly since my wet dreams had been put to shame by the reality that was Colin and Lincoln. Unfortunately, it had also been the night that they’d become something more to me than vague fantasies. Hearing Colin’s story had made me face just how deep my feelings ran, and instead of facing that head on, I was hiding.

My heart hurt because I knew Colin probably thought telling me about his past had killed my interest in them, but the truth was so much worse. I’d realized I was coming to love them. If I didn’t care, I would have continued to jump them at everyopportunity. But knowing how I felt and worrying about the future had paralyzed me in ways I wasn’t prepared for.

So instead of indulging in some of the best sex of my life, I made excuses about being tired and ran away to the sanctuary of my room. Having four hands, two cocks, two mouths plying me with pleasure had been even better than Dottie had implied at Midgard. It was addicting, but what if they didn’t feel what I was feeling? I couldn’t risk getting my heart crushed once they were done with me.

But what if they did feel what I was feeling? Could I really give myself fully to two hot dominant men? Yes. But why would they want me? I was just an ex-thief who had screwed up her life. I felt like we’d shared something special, but it could have all been in my mind. No. It hadn’t felt like just a physical act to bring me to orgasm, but more like the three of us had taken a deep dive together. It had felt raw and real, and that was why I was paralyzed.

I was a god damn independent woman and didn’t need men to run my life. But it felt so nice. I could rely solely on myself but why should I? The idea of being parted from them literally caused me physical pain. I was panicked, one hundred percent scared of these new feelings and not sure what to do about them. So I hid in my room, or the tub, or anywhere they wouldn’t bother me.

Whether they understood this, or were indulging my need for privacy, I wasn’t sure, but I was grateful for the space they gave me.

“Zara!” Colin’s voice boomed from the hall.

What the hell? It was only two in the afternoon. What were they doing at home already? They’d been leaving every morning and not returning until dinner. I wasn’t ready to pretend to be happy yet. My door banged open; Colin and Linc stood on the threshold faces grim as if they were ready for battle.

“Why are you still in bed? What’s going on?” Lincoln’s deep voice demanded answers.

I rubbed my eyes, not wanting to admit that I’d spent every day curled up like this when they were gone. “Nothing. I was tired so I took a nap. What’s wrong?”

The two men exchanged concerned looks which made my stomach swirl. Why couldn’t I just open up and share what I was thinking? Learning they didn’t feel anything for me but physical attraction had to be better than this limbo.

Colin sighed. “Get up and clean up. We have company coming.”

“Company?” Who the hell could be coming here?

“Yeah, our business partner, Gabriel, and his woman, Rose, are coming over.”

I couldn’t tell if Lincoln was happy or not by his tone.

“Why?” Why were strangers coming? I had enough to think about with Mihal and my feelings for these two gorgeous men. I didn’t need to add being social to that list.

Lincoln smirked. “Rose wants to meet you.”

“You two should have fun. Rose is a nuclear-level of force personality living in a tiny body.”

Colin’s smile as he turned and left was less amused and more sad. I knew my avoidance was hurting him, but I couldn’t seem to stop.

Lincoln looked between the two of us and shook his head before closing my door. What the hell was that about? I guessed I would have to put on my happy face earlier than usual. It seemed I was meeting this Rose person whether I wanted to or not.

After showering, I stared at my clothing choices trying to decide what was appropriate for meeting with their friends. I had exactly zero experience with what to expect. I’d had roommates in college but never connected with them for more than dividing up chores. How did someone dress for friends?

Without knowing what Rose was like, I couldn’t use my experience from childhood for getting close to marks. Foster care had been survival of the fittest, and I’d barely had enough clothes to make choices. Dressing for work was like wearing a uniform, so that didn’t help. Meeting this woman seemed important to Colin and Lincoln, and I didn’t want to disappoint them.

After way too much worrying, I chose a midnight-blue two-piece lounging set that said comfortable yet elegant. At least I hoped it did. Dressing for corporate America was a hell of a lot easier than dressing for casual acquaintances.

My hair, still damp from the shower, hung in loose waves down my back and I decided to put it in an upsweep with a few tendrils I curled with my finger, left hanging to frame my face. I slapped on mascara and a light-pink gloss on my lips and took a final look at myself.

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