Page 87 of Bound By Valor

With a wink, he excused himself, sauntering over to a lady whose arm seemed to need his immediate attention.

What a douche!

???

We were back at the Blackthorn office. Sebastian had gone to the hospital with Officer Grayson while the rest of us hovered near the Blackthorn private clinic.

All of us were checked and Leora was understandably under observation after being shot. Dylan’s gaze was fixed on some unseen point, his usual stoicism replaced by a hollow emptiness. Kabirand Amelia communicated in silent glances, a private world of shared grief. Booth stood there, with her arms crossed over her chest. Zane was downstairs in the command center, tying up our loose ends.

The doctor arrived, her expression unreadable.

“The patient is stable, awake and responsive. She needed a few stitches, but overall she’s not showing any adverse physical symptoms,” she looked at me then, “Which one of you is Logan? She’s asking for them.”

My heart constricted, a knot of dread tightening. I nodded, feeling the weight of impending reality as I stepped through the clinic’s doors into her room.

Part of me worried that I’d have to recount everything to her and watch sorrow wash over her. But there was another part, a more irrational one, that hoped that Logan would suddenly appear in the doorway and save me for the twenty-first time.

She looked so small in those white sheets. The patient gown was too large on her and with her sagged shoulders, she looked helpless.

She looked up at me with those beautiful eyes and I saw the only thing I hoped to never see.

Utter devastation.

“I remember. For a second I forgot, but I remember now,” she nodded to herself, “He’s gone. You don’t have to repeat yourself. I tried to rescue him. Fuck, Ididrescue him. And then that ass shoved me into the manhole and let himself die anyway. I failed my rescue. I failed—”

“Leora—”

“No, I did. I failed him. I failed the squad. I couldn’t fucking protect him,” she continued to frantically ramble as I sat down near the foot of thebed, “I don’t deserve to be a part of this squad. I failed Lo. He’s gone. He’s fucking gone. Poof.”

A laugh rumbled in her chest and her sagged shoulders shook with hysteria.Shit. She’s going to have a psychotic breakdown if I don’t bring her back.

“Baby,” I shifted closer to her and cupped her cheeks as she kept laughing, “Look at me. You didn’t do this. He died protecting you. He loved you.”

Something I said made her laughter snap off.

She fixed me with her piercing gaze and whispered, “Love. Do you still love me? I killed your brother. You should hate me, Zarek.”

This beautiful, amazing woman, who tried to save my brother, thought she could do something to make me hate her? But all I saw in those eyes in that moment was surrender and acceptance.

“Baby, I could never hate you. But you didn’t kill him. You tried to save him. You’re my hero, Leora. You did something that someone in your position wouldn’t have. They’d have been too scared. But you did it. You made it your mission to save Logan.”

I dropped my head on hers and felt her shivers and uncontrollable sobs.

“But he died anyway,” she started wailing then.

Even though Leora was falling apart, I found her vulnerability drawing mine to the surface. So, I finally let go.

With a deep breath, I surrendered to the emotions. My body trembled with sobs, and I let myself face the harrowing truth: Logan was gone.

EPILOGUE

Leora

ONE MONTH LATER

I realized that there was a limit to grief. At a particular point it was unwillingly morphed into acceptance until you’re left with nothing but the memories. That happened to me one day. It was a regular day at the Blackthorn security office. Planning. Plotting. Completing smaller assignments for a bigger goal of getting to Garret motherfucking Tyson.

Jerome Tyson had given us nothing and after a week of ‘questioning’ by Sebastian, he killed himself with a key that some junior officer had left in his interrogation room. Who knew that if you’re willing, you can find your carotid artery in four attempts.

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