Page 30 of In Bed with the Ice Queen

As she took a deep breath and sat up straight, wiping her tears away, she knew it was time to retreat emotionally. She had to guard her heart, even if it meant closing a door she wished could have opened wider.

After finding a desk attendant and with some crazy luck managing to get a cancellation- the only room available, she found her way to her new room. Settling into her newaccommodation, she stood in the middle of her hotel room, hands on her hips. She took a deep breath, inhaling the salty air, hoping it would calm her racing thoughts. Her hair fell softly over her shoulders as she turned to survey her surroundings.

“Why does it have to be so complicated?” she murmured. A small tear slipped down her cheek, and she quickly wiped it away.

Just then, her phone buzzed on the bedside table. She picked it up, heart racing, hoping it was a message from Helena. But it was just a reminder about the meeting the next morning.

Sloane huffed, tossing the phone back down. She gazed out at the waves crashing relentlessly against the shore; they seemed carefree while she felt like she was sinking.

Just as she was about to get up and grab a glass of water, her phone buzzed again. This time, it was a message from Helena.

“Can we talk? I’m at the café near the hotel.”

Sloane’s heart skipped. The mix of hope and anxiety made her feel dizzy. Taking a deep breath, she typed back, “I’ll be there in five minutes.”

After slipping into a light shirt, shorts and sandals, Sloane gave herself one last look in the mirror. “You can do this,” she whispered, trying to boost her confidence. She grabbed her purse and made her way to the door, the cool ocean breeze brushing against her cheeks.

When she entered the small café, her eyes scanned the room until they landed on Helena sitting at a corner table, her head bowed. Sloane’s heart sank again. Helena seemed so small, yet she was always so strong. She braced herself, feeling like it would likely be a conversation full of boundaries and regrets.

13

HELENA

Helena stood in her hotel room, staring out the window at the twinkling lights of the resort next door. It was late, but her mind was racing with thoughts of Sloane. She could still see Sloane’s long, wavy brown hair flowing gently behind her as she walked away. She watched silently as Sloane walked down the street, suitcase rolling along the path. Helena’s chest tightened as she observed her walking into the entrance of the nearby neighboring resort.

“What is wrong with me?” she muttered to herself, sinking into the oversized armchair by the window. She replayed their earlier conversation in her mind, her voice still echoing from the way she had dismissed Sloane.

And then she watched Sloane go, her eyes glimmering with something Helena could not put into words. It was a mixture of sadness and strength. It had made Helena’s heart ache, but she had pushed it aside, convincing herself it was for the best.

“It’s always about business,” she whispered, shaking her head. “You can’t let feelings get in the way.” But deep down, she knew that it wasn’t just about business. There was something much deeper, something she was afraid to acknowledge.

Helena remembered the moments they shared. The intimacy they shared. The way their bodies inched closer together. Sloane’s tight body, full of energy, matched with Helena’s own perfectionism. But every time their connection threatened to deepen beyond the professional, Helena shut it down.

“Why can’t I just let someone in? Why is it so hard?” she sighed, her voice barely above a whisper. It was an endless cycle. One she didn’t know how to break. She thought about how she had built walls so high and thick they felt like steel. And it was lonely up there.

Just then, she stared at the reflection in the window. The way she calculated every move, every friendship, every relationship through the eyes of a strategist.

She considered reaching out to clear the air, but doubt washed over her.

What would she say? “Hey, Sloane, forget everything I just said. I don’t want to lose you.” Helena couldn’t justify that kind of vulnerability; after all, what if Sloane didn’t feel the same way?

Helena’s phone buzzed on the table, breaking the silence. She glanced at it, her heart skipping when she saw Sloane’s name at the top of the screen. “No, don’t,” she whispered, shaking her head. But the urge to grab the phone was overwhelming.

“Just one message. Just one,” she said, fingers hovering over the screen.

But she hesitated. What if…? The thought of Sloane’s hurt expression lingered in her mind, and the weight of regret pressed down on her shoulders.

“Maybe I messed up too much,” Helena finally admitted silently to herself as she put the phone back down. “Maybe if I had let us connect, this wouldn’t feel so empty.”

She walked over to the window, peering out again. The resort seemed so close, yet so far. In her heart, she knew what shewanted—someone to escape with, not just to fight against in the corporate world but to share the emotions of her hectic life—but fear kept her lonely and isolated.

Helena picked up a pillow and hugged it tightly, her emotions swirling. As the city hummed outside, she knew she had to make a choice. It felt like she had to make it right now, and the pressure was suffocating.

Without thinking too much, she grabbed her phone and dialed her sister's number.

“Hey, Helena!” her sister, Rachel, answered cheerfully. “What’s up?”

Helena hesitated for a moment. She almost said “nothing,” but that felt wrong. “Um, Rachel...I’m having a rough time.”

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