Page 54 of How to Rescue Your Surprise Baby

“I’m not pissing on twenty kits,” Telos said.

“Of course not. Besides, that’ll be hard to get the timing right.” Mav reached into the bag, frowning when the first test kit came out wrapped in a giant pink bow.

“What,” Telos said, turning to look at Hadley. Except the butler had vanished behind Hilly-Billy, watching them from over his brother’s shoulder.

“It’s a celebration!” Hadley said cheerily. “We want a baby!”

Telos scowled. “You wantmeto have a baby. Not your choice to make, baby bro.”

Mav pulled apart the bow. A slip of pink paper fluttered onto his lap.

It was a handwritten note.

To the man I manfully knocked up, I think your buttcheeks are round and glorious like the moon.

Telos read the note over Mav’s shoulder, impressed.

Hadley cackled. “Dragon Master, you’re supposed to give it to Telos.”

Mav frowned. And hesitated. Then he offered the note to Telos. “Do you want it?”

“Not if you don’t mean it.”

Mav sighed and shoved it into his own pocket. Telos fought back a stab of disappointment; Mav looked up.

“It’s not that I don’t think—” Mav cleared his throat. “The note is vulgar.”

Telos’ eyebrows crawled up. “How wouldyouphrase it, then?”

Mav glanced at the seven pairs of eyes watching them, and scowled. “I’ll tell you some other day.”

But that meant therewassomething to be told. Telos’ heart fluttered.

Mav glanced at Telos’ chest, and smiled his tiny smile again.

Okay, maybe Telos could get used to this.

He grabbed a test kit from the bag and unraveled the bow, expecting the awful pickup line this time.

When my big alpha balls and your big alpha balls collide, they make a sound so loud, both our worlds vibrate and merge, just like our souls merging to become one.

“How do balls make that much noise?” Telos asked dubiously.

“There’s more on the back,” Hadley whispered.

Telos turned over the slip of paper.

We will merge like slime monsters who will be stuck together for the rest of the movie and then something terrible will kill us.

Telos groaned. “Okay, evenIthink that is bad. No one should die in a movie!”

“Even in a horror movie?” Mav asked.

Telos sniffed. “I don’t like horror movies.”

“Ah.” Something warm flickered in Mav’s eyes. “I don’t enjoy them either.”

“Well, good.” Actually... were they flirting? Telos couldn’t quite tell. It was nice, though, sitting with his shoulder bumping against Mav’s, leaning into him while Estie yanked on her stuffed rabbit’s ears.

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