Page 21 of All I Want For Christmas

Morning sex didn’t happen. Shower sex didn’t happen.

Matt couldn’t believe that he’d fallen asleep. He also couldn’t believe that Lindsey hadn’t awakened him.

That wasn’t true. He could believe that. She would have wanted to let him rest. Especially since she didn’t know that their time together was limited.

Waking up with her in his arms had been amazing. For thirty seconds. Then she’d elbowed him in the gut and jumped out of bed ordering him into the closet because the boys were on their way down the hall.

So he’d hidden out, naked and semi-erect, while she’d herded his boys back out the door and into their room to get ready to run errands with her.

He’d been torn between laughing and groaning. He wanted to see the boys. He wanted to put Lindsey up on the bathroom counter and sink into her over and over and over.

He didn’t actually get to do either of those things. Yet. He was now in the kitchen of the diner where Lindsey had brought the boys for breakfast.

She needed to get the car’s oil changed. He wished he could just do it for her so that he could keep her in bed and makewaffles for the boys in their own kitchen. But she already had the car appointment and, dammit, there was so much he wanted to get done while he was here, that he simply couldn’t prioritize an oil change.

But at least hewasmaking the boys waffles. It wasn’t in their own kitchen, and they didn’t know he was doing it—yet—but it was something.

“Okay, they’re here,” Jay, the owner of the diner said, coming into the kitchen.

“Great.” Finally, he was going to see the boys. “Have they ordered?”

“I’m just getting them juice and coffee,” Jay said. “But I heard Liam ask about pancakes.”

Obviously, Lindsey and the boys were regulars here. Jay had been more than happy to let Matt into the kitchen to make Liam and Aidan waffles this morning. He’d thanked Matt for his service and told him that his boys were wonderful. That was pretty much all the man had to do to be Matt’s friend.

He poured more batter into the waffle griddle. “I hope they’re okay with not having pancakes.”

Jay put a carafe of coffee, a cup, and two glasses of orange juice on a tray and picked it up. He gave Matt a wink as he backed out through the swinging door. “Lean in close to the window there and you’ll hear just how okay they’re going to be,” Jay said.

Matt crossed to the window that opened between the kitchen and the dining area. He stayed to one side, out of sight of where Lindsey and the boys were sitting, but Jay had put them in the booth closest to the door to the kitchen so he could hear the exchange from where he was standing.

“Okay, guys, so we have something really special on the menu today,” Jay said, setting the glasses and coffee down. “Blueberry waffles!”

Matt peeked around the corner to see Liam shaking his head. “We don’t want waffles.” He nudged Aidan. “Right?”

Aidan nodded, but he didn’t look too thrilled. “Right.”

“What?” Jay said. “You guys don’t like waffles?”

“We like thema lot!” Aidan said enthusiastically

“Why don’t you tell Jay why you don’t want waffles?” Lindsey said. “He’ll understand.”

Liam looked up, giving Matt his first good look at his son’s face and his heart stuttered. He’d just been on Skype with both boys a couple of days ago and yet, Liam looked different. Older. Less a little boy than the one in Matt’s head. Even though he saw photos and talked to them face-to-face online, the image of his sons in his mind were of little boys. Not school-aged, with friends and activities and experiences that he was missing. It had been one thing to miss first steps and first words, but over the past couple of years, Matt had realized that it was a lot harder missing things that the boys would remember, that really mattered tothem. First homeruns and first science fairs and first crushes. And there would be more. First dates, first break-ups, first victories, and first defeats.

They would talk about it on the phone, on Skype, on his visits home, of course. But it wouldn’t be the same. They were growing up fast.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he swore under his breath.

The job. It was always there. Always.

He pulled his phone out as he heard Liam say, “We only eat waffles with our dad. When he makes them.”

Matt felt like Liam had punched him in the chest.

“LaSalle,” he ground out as he answered the phone.

“New plan,” Simon said.

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