Page 86 of How to Score Off Field

“Yes.”

“Why are you half naked?”

“I’m not half naked.”

He snorts. “Dude, you’re only wearing underwear, and I can tell you had your hand on your cock.”

I do not have my hand on my fucking dick.

“How the hell can you tell if I have my hand on my cock or not? What are you, psychic?”

“No, I’m a twin.” He rolls his eyes, still planted in the same spot. “Are you having phone sex?”

“No. And even if I were, it would be none of your damn business.”

My brother laughs. “Yes, you are. Don’t lie.”

“I’m not.”

He stands in the doorway, and I curse myself for not having the foresight to lock the damn door.

“Dude, it’s not a big deal. Daisy and I do it all the time, and we’re not even long-distance.”

How does he know I’m talking to someone long-distance? For all he knows, this is someone I met on the dumb dating app he installed on my phone.

That I deleted last week.

“Did you barge in here to tell me something, or are you just being nosy?”

“Just being nosy. I heard voices, so naturally, I had to see who you were talkin’ to.” He pauses. “Who are you talkin’ to?”

I give him a look that says “you know who I’m talking to,” but he doesn’t get the hint to shut his yap.

“That’s Tess Donahue? ’Cause what did I tell you about shittin’ where you eat?”

Oh my god…

“Well. If you’re gonna bone your best friend’s sister and then fuck her via video chat, you might as well make the best of it.” He uncrosses his arms to salute me. “Godspeed, my friend.”

He walks out, pulling the door closed behind him, but it doesn’t click into place.

“CLOSE THE FRIGGIN’ DOOR!” I shout after him, and thank Christ he comes back to properly shut it.

“Sorry.” Another salute and he’s gone.

I breathe in and out, winded from the stress of it all.

God, he’s obnoxious.

Tess clears her throat in the background.

“Wow,” she finally allows, and I catch her nibbling at her bottom lip, a move I find sexy as hell. She looks innocent, but I know she’s not.

“Now, what was he saying about phone sex? I think it’s a lovely idea, don’t you?”

“Yes, but I don’t know how I feel about it when he’s lurking in the hallway.”

“Is his bedroom upstairs by yours?”

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