Page 144 of How to Score Off Field

The word feels so foreign to me; a word I never thought I would assign to myself or my feelings or my state of well-being, but here I am, needing to heal and not wanting to do it alone.

"Look,"he said, his tone softening."I might have given you a hard time”—he cleared his throat—“about your choices, but, uh. I love you, you know? And I, uh, I support you.”

I let the silence take up space in the universe so he can choose his next sentence.

“Just promise me you'll be careful, okay? I know you, Tess – you jump in headfirst, and I don't want to see you get hurt."

“Jump in headfirst?”I laughed. “What are you even talking about? I don’t know if I ever told you this because it was none of your business but I’ve been in love with Drew Colter since I was in middle school—there was nothing ‘headfirst’ about it.”

I smiled despite the seriousness of the conversation.

I lowered my voice, getting serious."Listen.I promise I'll be careful. I want you to consider contacting Drew and apologizing—I don’t think you and I will be ‘good’ until you do.”

If you could hear a nod through a cell phone, I could hear his.

“Okay.”

“Good.”

"Good,"he repeated. "And you better bring me back a souvenir or something. I haven’t been to the Midwest in years.”

I laughed. "I'll see what I can do. Maybe a keychain or a postcard from the airport?"

"Now you're talking," he said.“Tess?”

“Hm?”

“I’m really fucking sorry. About everything.”

“I know.”

And I do. My brother might have been acting out the past few weeks but he’s had my back my entire life. This was the first time in our lives we’d been at odds, and it was one of the loneliest, not having him supporting me because he was butt hurt about Drew.

Would it have made a difference if some other guy had gotten me, you know—preggo?

Maybe.

Maybe not.

* * *

“Damn,Tess, I haven’t seen you in years. Drew wasn’t kidding when he said you were all grown up.”

Drake Colter, looking so much like his twin, but at the same time so unlike his twin, wraps me in a hug, his massive body swallowing me hole.

I wasn’t sure how he’d be.

Drake isn’t warm and fuzzy like Drew is and with all the drama and excitement that’s been going on, I wasn’t sure how he’d receive me.

My worries fade as I’m ushered through their door.

Upstairs to his room.

The first thing I notice is the balloon bouquet floating in a mass above the desk. I quickly count them and come up with six, one of them loose and bouncing against the ceiling when we move through the room.

The balloons don’t say anything. They’re just hearts.

Silver and purple hearts.

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