Page 6 of How to Win the Girl

“So…you’re crashing a date?”

“No.” I roll my eyes. “I’m checkin’ it out. There’s a difference.” I pause. “And I wouldn’t call it a date. They’re having drinks ’cause they’ve never met.”

Felicity doesn’t look convinced. “What’s the difference?”

“I’m not planning on ruinin’ it. I only want to meet the chick to see if we’ll vibe.”

Felicity crosses her arms. “You’re telling me you’d rather go and hijack your brother’s date than get your dick sucked.”

Yeah, totally. It’s not like I’m all that horny.

I scratch behind my ear. “Do y’all take rain checks?”

Her nostrils flare. “No.”

I would if I were her, but who am I to tell her how to live her life. “That a hard no?”

“Hard no.”

That’s a shame but not really a drag. Plenty of lips on campus willing to do the job if I have an itch, the girl next door—Shannon—being one of them, though she and her roommates aren’t really welcome around the house anymore.

If I want sex without benefits, I have to walk my dick next door.

Bit of a pain ’cause that means I can’t roll over and go straight to sleep after having an orgasm.

“Alright. I’ll be on my way then, got shit to do.”

“You’re an asshole,” she spats, miffed. The tote on her shoulder appears to be weighing her down, and if she was being more polite, I’d offer a ride to wherever she was headed. ’Cause I’m a gentleman and that’s what we do.

I shrug.

I’ve known the girl all of ten minutes and in that time, she has:

Insinuated that she was down for a head bobber, in broad daylight, in the school parking.

Insinuated she may or may not have a boyfriend but would cheat if I’d let her.

Called me an asshole when I told her I didn’t have time to have my pole waxed.

Chicks are so weird. Whoever her boyfriend is or isn’t, he’s one unlucky bastard and more than welcome to her.

Hoping in my truck, buckling in and starting the engine, I barely glance in the rearview mirror.

two

daisy

“HOROSCOPE: We all know love isn’t always fun and games, but Venus will move into airy Aquarius and your house of pleasure on the 2ndof the month—the next several weeks should be filled with enough sex and laughter to keep your toes curled…”

Ugh.

As if.

I set down my cell phone, rolling my eyes at my love horoscope. “The next several weeks will be filled with sex and laughter?” I snort. “Highly unlikely.”

I wasn’t in a relationship, and there wasn’t anyone on the horizon for me, though I was in the process of trying.

Putting myself out there, if you will. On the market.

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