Page 17 of How to Lose at Love

I hop out of the truck, phone already in the palm of my hand.

Dallas Colter continues watching me from the curb, and I stop in the middle of the lawn, pivoting on my heels so I can stare him down.

“Go.” I shoo him away, irritated.

A few more seconds, then finally he’s pulling away. I watch as his taillights disappear down the street.

“Well. This was a fucked-up night.”

three

dallas

“If love is the answer, I’m going to need you to

rephrase the question.”

– Dallas

Things I’ve never been accusedof, in no particular order:

Giving a shit about other people’s opinions of me

Caring what my clothes look like

Wanting a relationship

Making friends

I have no time for any of that bullshit.

So when my new agent, Elias Cohen, calls and says, “Dallas, I think you need more of a personal life,” I’m taken aback.

“Come again?” I heard what he said, but I need him to repeat it.

“Teams like to know that you’re well-rounded. These days they’re looking for more family-oriented players than what we’ve been used to in the past. Guys who don’t get caught with their pants down around their ankles and don’t constantly post themselves partying on social media.”

“Whatcha mean then by personal life? I don’t have social media and I don’t sleep around.”

“Well now, that’s the thing. Maybe you should start an Instagram so they have something to look at when they’re trying to decide if they want you on their team.” He briefly moves out of frame in our video chat, reemerging with his cell phone. “See here? Even Eric Decker has an Instagram. Tons of followers, too.”

“Eric is retired.”

“But look how wholesome he is. That’s what team owners want.”

Wholesome? Since when is amanwholesome?

“Why do I have to create a social media account so I can be fake?”

“It’s about cultivating an image. Think of it as marketing.”

I’ll think of it all right.

Not.

“What am I supposed to do, go to the pumpkin patch and pose for pictures?”

“See now, that’s a great idea.”

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