Page 45 of How to Lose at Love

“He thinks I need to find a respectable, responsible girl to hang out with. Well, beseenhanging out with,” he amends.

“And?”

“And…” He bobs his head around as if that explanation was enough and the head bobbing is its punctuation.

“And…?” Are we really doing this? Is he going to finish his sentence or are we going to stand here bobbing our heads?

“I figured…”

“Figured what?” I think my eyebrows are raised, but my face seems to be frozen solid. Numb.

Then.

The reality of his words sets in.

My palms go up. “No. No, no, no.”

“It will be easy! You’d be like an escort.”

“An escort? How lovely.” I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. In fact, my intelligence level just dropped a few points from hearing him speak.

“My agent said I’m not allowed to pay you.”

“Did he?” Wow. Dallas Colter sure knows how to lay on the charm when he’s asking someone out. “Dude, you don’t need my help pretending to be your girlfriend—you need actual help from anactualprofessional.”

He is nonplussed. “Who said anything about pretending to be my girlfriend? I just need a responsible, respectable girl to hang out with.”

“And you think that’s me?”

“Well.” He looks me up and down, gesturing vaguely. “Obviously.”

I have no idea whether or not to be insulted. Again.

“Define ‘responsible and respectable’.” I cross my arms, my feet rooted to the cement sidewalk.

Not sure how I feel about being described as respectable by the hottest guy on campus, for a number of reasons.

It’s not sexy.

That’s not how I would describe myself if I had to choose adjectives.

It’s not sexy.

“You know—you’re chill. Kind of like…” He’s clearly struggling to find the right words. “Okay, so if this were a movie, you’d be the wholesome girl next door. Except the girls who live next to our house barely wear any clothes and keep trying to sleep with my brothers. So the opposite of that.”

My face turns scarlet red; even in this cold weather, I can feel it burning, and only one thought enters my brain.

Dallas Colter is the worst.

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dallas

“I’m not saying the blond neighbor girl is a gold digger, but Iamimplying it.”

– Dallas to Drake

Dude,what is her problem?

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