Page 75 of Midnight Wedding

“I had hoped I might get the chance to make you understand before you saw all that,” he says at last and comes to sit at the end of the bed.

I pull my knees to my chest, hugging myself tightly, too afraid to do anything else. I don’t know what to think anymore. The effects of the drug are mostly gone now, but the memory of that room is still sharp in my mind.

I knew Arsen had a dark history. I understood that and I still was willing to look past it.

But how am I supposed to ignore this?

“Then make me understand,” I say, almost pleading.

“Maud’s right. I should’ve gotten rid of them a long time ago.” He leans forward, elbows on his knees, not looking at me. Arsen’s such a big, powerful man, but there’s a deep vulnerability to him. That’s a side he keeps hidden. Like those skeletons.

“Who are they?”

“My old guards.”

I go very still. A tingle runs down my spine. “The ones that used to hurt you?” I whisper.

He nods slowly, not looking at me. “When I took over from my father, I hunted them down. I wanted to wipe the slate clean. I wanted to take revenge on them for what they did to me. But it didn’t help. Killing them didn’t fix the wound in me. That’s why they’re still in that room. That’s my father’s old office. That’s where they tortured me the most back when I was young. I turned them into skeletons and thought maybe leaving them in there forever would be enough, but it’s only been a burden. It didn’t take away the pain, heal the scars, or erase the memories.”

I stare at his rounded shoulders, at this powerful man hunched forward as if in pain. It’s hard for me to understand why anyone would think keeping a murder-shrine was a good idea, but he’s clearly still struggling to come to grips with what happened to him. Maybe he doesn’t even realize he’s still processing.

That doesn’t make him weak. It makes him a human being.

I lean forward and touch him. I do it softly, as if stroking a hungry bear. He half-turns to look at me. His eyes are deep and sorrowful and so, so beautiful.

“The skeletons are creepy, Arsen,” I tell him. “You have to get rid of them.”

His mouth opens—and then he laughs. He grins and shakes his head, and a low chuckle rips from his throat. I smile back at him, trembling with fear, but also with something else.

I’m seeing a part of him that nobody else was meant to see.

He keeps this locked behind a door.

But he’s letting me inside.

Well—I had to pick the lock. But still.

“I know you’re right. I’ve known it for a while. I just didn’t know how to let go until now.”

“Letting go is the easy part.” I move closer to him. “We’ll clean up the blood. Trash the bodies. Burn that whole wing, actually.”

“Maybe we can stick with cleaning it.”

“Fine, but I’ll gladly start the fire if you need help.”

“I bet you would, baby. I think you might’ve set me all the fuck ablaze already.”

I lean against his back, wrap my arms around him, and hug tightly. He breathes out a sigh and presses into me. I hold him like that and slowly the fear evaporates.

This is a man. A scarred and hurting man, but still only a man.

“Don’t drug me ever again, okay?” I whisper, my face against his shoulder.

“I’ll speak with Maud again.”

“She’s seriously a poisoner?”

“One of the most ruthless killers in the whole mafia, believe it or not.”

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