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I can’t believe I went so far with him, let alone out in the open like that. I’m not sure what came over me. Actually, I know exactly what came over me… a giant, country music star with rough hands and muscles for days. I cringe at the thought of what the paparazzi will do with those photos. Buck looks good no matter what angle he’s in. Me… not so much. I can’t stop seeing the photos of a soaking wet version of me climbing up out of the stream like a monster. I can’t imagine how embarrassing that would be for Buck. He could have any woman in the world, yet here he is, messing around with the creek creep of some small mountain town.

When we pull into my driveway, I figure I need to say something, but I still don’t know what. On one hand, we should really talk. On the other, talking requires a person who knows what to say, and I don’t. I’ve never known what to say. That’s why I haven’t answered his calls. It’s why I shouldn’t have come out tonight. It’s why I isolate myself… always.

The sky has gone dark and his headlights shine toward the old farmhouse I’ve been fixing up. “It’s crazy you’re doing all this work yourself,” he says, turning toward me. “You know I don’t mind helping out sometime.”

I wet my lips and turn toward him, my stomach aching as I conjure the words to tell him I’ve known all along. “Buck, we have a great time together. You’re sweet, your funny, you’re romantic, and talented as hell, but—”

“Don’t do it,” he groans. “Just don’t.”

“Don’t do what?” I swallow hard and knot my fingers together.

“You know what. Don’t break it off with me. We’ve barely started. I’ve waited months to see where this could go. Today sucked, and I’m sorry. I should’ve been more careful. We should’ve planned something inside. I… that guy was a piece of shit for what he did. I—”

I push my hair back away from my face and stare at him.Why does he have to be so handsome? Why does he have to have those piercing blue eyes? Why does he have to look so damn self-assured?

“Like I said, I really like you. I just… I don’t think I’m built for all this, ya know?”

“Built for what?” He leans forward. “The cameras? I can hire security. I’ve been needing it for a while, anyway. We can make this happen if we want to.”

“How does that work? Does security stay ten feet away at all times? Would they have been watching you finger me in the bushes today? I mean, if I’m honest, it’s not only the cameras. It’s all the women, everywhere. They’re gorgeous. It’s hard to understand why you’d ever want me.” I glance down at myself, taking note of the soaking wet hair and the roll of fat the wet dress does no favors for. “Look at me, Buck. You could do so much better than some small-town trash.” My cheeks heat andI slide from the truck out into the rain. “I had fun tonight, but I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.”

I don’t turn back, but I hear Buck’s truck door open and close, then his boots crunching toward the front porch after me. “Trash?” He blurts, “What did you say?”

I whip back toward him, my chest tight. “Yeah, so what?”

“You aren’t trash, Opal. That’s ridiculous.”

“Okay,” I cross my arms over my chest and stare up at him, then away again as my cheeks heat. “What do you know?”

“No,” he growls low in his throat as another van with cameras pulls up at the end of my driveway. “Don’t look at them, look at me.”

I roll my eyes and tighten my arms against my chest. “There’s nothing left to say, Buck. You’re a great guy, but I’m a broken girl. I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to make myself believe any of it’s real.”

“Look at me.” He lifts my chin until my gaze lands on his. “You’re more beautiful than any woman I’ve ever seen. But more than that, I feel something with you, Opal. Something real. I can’t explain it but that night we spent together at the diner was genuine. That doesn’t happen every day.”

I laugh under my breath and look away before backing up. “I was a wreck that night, Buck. I was melting at a table when you found me. It was one of the lowest points in my life. And yes, we connected. Yes, something happened. Yes, I thought about you too, but,” I hold air in my lungs, then let it out slowly, “aren’t you getting ready to leave on tour, anyway?”

He nods and kicks his boot gently against the porch.

“When do you leave for that?”

“End of the week.”

“If this were about a quick fuck, I’d let you in right now. I’d get cleaned up, I’d make us dinner, and I’d get down on my knees and suck you dry. Trust me, I want you, but I can’t takethe aftermath of you leaving. I’m not built for that. My mind will always wonder what you’re doing and who you’re doing it with. I told you… I’m broken.” Tears stream down my face and I turn away.

He steps closer. “You’re scared. I get that. I’m scared, too. I’ve never felt anything real like this, but I gotta say, the thought of never knowing what could be is even scarier.” He’s so close that I can feel his breath on my skin again, and I love it. I love it so much that I’m desperate to lift up onto my toes and crash into him, but what would that prove?

Tingles travel up and down my spine, through my thighs, and into my groin. I want him so bad. I want his touch, his breath, his deep voice in my ear. I want everything, all at once, right now, with only him…but I can’t.

“Don’t we know the answer to that question already, Buck?”

He shakes his head. “What?”

“We’ll have a wild love affair. It’ll be great for a year, you’ll think you’re ready to settle down and have a family, so we’ll get married. I’ll get pregnant and you’ll remember how good things were out on the road. You’ll beg to go out and play one last show, which will remind you how bored you are at home, and eventually those girls that throw themselves at you will look better and better until you’re doing things you swore to me you’d never do.” I let out a sigh. “What then?”

He stares down at the porch and shakes his head before glancing up again. “I reckon you’ve got everything figured out, Opal, and I’d say it’s pretty damn sad.”

“Sad?” I laugh. “Sad how? It’s reality, Buck. Men don’t stick around. Love isn’t real.You’re not real.I’m not real. None of this is real!”

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