Page 28 of XO

“The play may mean nothing to me, but it means something to me that it’s important to you.” He brushes past me, and I can’t hide my blush. Jacob kicks his shoes off and flops onto my bed, making himself perfectly at home. Jacob Lynch, my sworn enemy of years, is now lying on my bed. What the fuck is going on in the universe. “And besides…” he continues, leaning up on a propped elbow, “… I know coach will turn a blind eye to any absences.”

I climb onto the bed in front of him and cross my legs. “Jacob, why do you play when your heart’s not in it?”

He looks at the script and then back to me. “Because it’s the only thing I’m good at.”

I scoff. “You can’t be serious. You legit put Mr. Johnson to shame with your math skills. And besides, you’ve given your whole life so far to the game, so of course, you wouldn’t know what else you’re good at.”

“If I left before I get scouted for college football, my dad will flip into a flying rage.”

“But if he didn’t, and he accepted you leaving, would you?”

“In a heartbeat.”

My own heart breaks.

“What would you do?”

“See the world first in all its glory and shittiness. Then buy a huge block of land somewhere in the countryside where I can have a beautiful private ranch, a dog and cat… maybe some horses down the line.” There’s a deep-seated sadness in his tone as he rolls on his back and stares blankly at the ceiling. His shirt raises over his pants, revealing a taste of his smooth abdomen, complete with a well-defined V-shape pointing to his groin. I shake my head, clearing the X-rated visions. “If we win the game on Friday, it’ll place us in the semis. Word has it, according to Kevin’s dad, college scouts will be attending the second semis and the finals. Coach won’t confirm because he doesn’t want it interfering with our performance.”

“And if you get offered a contract?”

Jacob sighs as if he’s struggling with the weight of the decision. “I haven’t thought that far ahead yet.”

I move on impulse, giving no thought to repercussions or possible rejection. Lying down next to him, I roll on my side, take his arm and drape it over me, holding his hand in mine. With his chin resting on top of my head, Jacob pulls me closer against his chest, perfecting our spooning position.

There’s noTaming of the Shrewtonight. There’s no more talk about college football and overbearing parents. The only sound we make is our heavy breathing as well fall asleep until the sound of a closing car door reluctantly pulls us apart.

7

THEN

“I never thought this day would come.” Beside me, Nessa barely dodges the crowds as we try to find our seats. She, like me, shares a particular dislike for anything sporty. This is a huge game between the Giants and our home team, Panthers, as it will decide who gets into the semis. What feels like everyone from two states has come to watch and barrack for their team. There’s a sea of purple and green, predominately purple being home ground. But despite my indifference for the game itself, the atmosphere is so electric it tingles my skin.

My cell chimes, and it’s Anna.

Anna:I see you. Keep heading down. Second row from the front.

I look up and notice she’s waving. I wave back in acknowledgment, and we take to the stairs. Anna is very much similar to Nessie and me in that she’s artistic and doesn’t sway to public opinion, but unlike us, she has a love of football because it’s practically in her blood. Her dad is a Panther’s alumni, and her twin brother is an outside linebacker on the team. Scooting past those who are already seated, Nessie and I claim our spots.

“Having doubts about coming, were you?” she asks, and I take a moment to admire her commitment to the game. She wears the Panthers fan jersey, purple nail polish and lipstick and some purple curly mass of ribbons around her ponytail. I, on the other hand, didn’t think about team spirit paraphernalia and chose a simple pink dress with boots and a light cardigan.

“Well, when I asked my dad to drop us off at the game, he didn’t quite believe us and took some convincing,” I say, recalling how my dad’s brows had practically shot off his forehead at the suggestion.

“We have perfect seats. The Panthers will be running on from the tunnel below us.”

I’m struck by a sudden wave of nausea that has nothing to do with being ill during the week, and I choose to ignore the fact that it has everything to do with Jacob. The crowd roars as the Panthers’ cheerleaders take to the field, ready to do a routine to Bruno Mars’ ‘24K Magic.’ Throughout the routine, the grown-ass man behind me sporting a Giants jersey, hollers vulgar suggestions and catcalls the girls young enough to be his daughters. It takes all my strength to bite my tongue and not give him a serve.

“Just let it go,” Nessie urges, and I take a breath to steady my irritation. “Not even Jesus can fix stupid.”

Agreeing, the three of us watch as Chelsea takes center stage looking as glamorous as she does when simply walking the school corridor. Her beaming smile reaches the audience, and her body moves to the approval of their cheers. She performs expertly maneuvered flips, jumps, and spins and lands like an angel back on her feet, pom-poms moving and shaking in time with the music. When the set finishes, Chelsea and her cheer squad do what they do best, get the crowd amped for the teams about to take the field. People are up on their feet, a mix of Panthers and Giants fighting to be heard.

We turn to Anna who’s hollering for her team as much as the passionate man next to her.

“Do you love anything as much as these people love their football?” Nessie shouts in my ear.

“I thought I did, but now I’m not so sure.”

I think about Jacob and how he simply doesn’t share his father’s passion for the game. And that’s coming from the team captain.

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