Page 45 of Neverland

Chapter 12

NOW

I didn’t sleep.

That made it seventy-two hours since I last closed my eyes. They felt swollen and sore, a combination of crying, fatigue, cigar smoke, and… him.

A perfect heart shape.

Xavier had brought on a wave of memories, and along with them, heartache. They were the last words he said to me before I was pulled from his lap, Dominic’s jealousy finally reaching its breaking point. He’d encouraged the men to indulge in me, yet jealousy ate away at him like a cancer until he was forced to excuse us from the meeting and get me as far away from Xavier as possible.

Although we’d walked to the door, hand in hand, Dominic squeezed so tight I thought he’d snap my fingers. The drive home was a silent one. While I fought the urge to be sick, the car’s motion nursing waves of nausea, Dominic used his thumb and forefinger to stroke his jaw, lost in contemplation.

“What did he say to you?” he finally asked what was on his mind.

“Nothing.” I had no intention of sharing any more of my past with Dominic Salvatore.

Although he was unconvinced, Dominic didn’t press the issue. When the SUV pulled up outside my apartment building, Dominic escorted me up, ensuring I made it to my door. Standing in the threshold, I’d blocked him from entering. He didn’t seem too concerned. Instead, I was seeing a very different emotion from him. One that was both difficult to read, and truly frightening. It was calculated, cold and detached. But why? It was unlike him and that was the scariest part.

“I want to go to bed,” I said, keeping my eyes glued to the second button of his shirt.

He didn’t respond but his eyes were still drilling deep gouges all the way to my soul. I shifted uncomfortably until I braved closing the door on him. His flat palm stopped it from closing even a few inches.

“You wanted to fuck him,” he said in a calm, collected tone.

I swallowed hard. “What are you talking about?” Dominic pushed the door back so hard, it smashed against the wall. “What are you doing?” I knew his silence would fester into something to be feared. With his hand flat on my chest, Dominic sent me stumbling back until I fell on the sofa, him on top of me.

“Tell me how much you wanted to fuck him, Lucy.” He breathed heavy, pinning my hands above my head.

“I didn’t, I swear,” I stated while raising my hips to get him off me. Dominic was a handsome man, dark and striking, but when he was like this, those dark and striking features became reflections of his possessed soul

“I saw how you were with him, Lucy, so don’t lie to me. You wanted to fuck him, and it was only a room full of people that stopped you.”

“No, that’s not true,” I cried. “I was only doing what you told me to do.”

Holding both wrists with one hand, he ran the other between my legs, his fingers slipping into my panties. I was done taking on the humiliation every time he assaulted me. So instead, I faced him with a stoicism he didn’t expect.

“I may have told you, Lucy, but…” his mouth grazed mine, “… this little pussy of yours was wanting something it’s never had.”

Dominic rubbed my clit, soft at first, then adding pressure. I squirmed under his touch, fighting the sensations he caused. My senses were already heightened from both Xavier and whatever drug Momma G had given, but I was about to let Dominic win by taking control of my body’s reactions. His knee spread my legs open, allowing a finger to slide inside.

“Do you know how I can tell you wanted to fuck him?” he breathed heavily into my ear. When I didn’t answer, he continued, “Because your pussy is responding to my touch.”

Biting my bottom lip, I ignored his coercion, willing my body to do the same. But I was failing. The more Dominic increased the pressure on my clit, the more heated I became, an unfamiliar feeling starting to course through me. I was panting before it even happened, Dominic smiling against my cheek knowing he was claiming another part of me. Knowing how much I hated him, yet he was able to bring me to orgasm, something I’d never experienced before because he kept me under lock and key.

When the pressure became too much, I couldn’t bear it any longer. My traitorous body released what felt like a tidal wave of pleasure, my hips moving under Dominic while his hard cock pressed into me. I felt weak and delirious, hating myself for everything this man was able to do to me.

“That’s my girl,” he laughed, victorious before gripping my face. “You may fucking hate me, Lucy, but I will always have power over you.”

When Dominic left, I scrubbed myself clean of his touch, cried against the tiles, and avoided my reflection in the mirror. I didn’t want to see the person I’d become. I didn’t want to see the lost, damaged girl I knew would stare back at me.

Instead of sleeping, I found myself thinking of the night, before Dominic had me on the sofa. Xavier consumed my thoughts because he reminded me of those four words I’d heard almost eight years ago. Four words which belonged to a fifteen-year-old, baby-faced boy, who had a fierceness in his heart. But there was something about Xavier that had me sitting on my bedroom floor, head leaning against the bed and staring up at the full moon. His touch gave me butterflies, the way he looked at me with a sensual curiosity that sent my heart into flutter, the way his words touched a nerve deep within… the way his fingers lingered on mine when I was pulled from his lap. That sudden feeling of disconnection when our hold was broken.

I wanted to see him again. I wanted to clearly see his face without being hindered by drugs and see if the man behind the beard was more than just a memory.

A small smile played on my lips but it was melancholic. I wondered what Romeo had become. He always wanted to change the world. He detested injustice which is how he always found himself in trouble. I wondered what he looked like. Would he still have a baby face behind his smooth caramel skin?

Rising to my feet, I tore the comforter and pillow off the bed and set myself up in the closet. Tonight, I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts. I didn’t want Dominic privy to something I held so dear. I didn’t want him to tarnish my memories to the point I’d no longer be able to recognize them.

I tucked myself in and stared at the brilliant stars glued to the ceiling above. I dreamed of a day I would see Romeo again, but then the usual doubts reared their ugly head. Would he be disgusted in what I’d become? Would he say he wanted nothing to do with me after knowing everything I’d been through and seen? Would he be like Xavier and deal in illegal arms trading? Or had he proven to change the world, one injustice at a time? Had he ever loved? Did he have a beautiful wife in a beautiful house with a white picket fence? Were they both educated, college degrees hanging on the walls with healthy bank accounts? Did he have children who looked just like him?

I blinked the tears away and swallowed the lump in my throat.

Memories were bittersweet. They warmed my heart remembering how handsome he was when he smiled at me, and then broke my heart knowing that very smile could be given to someone else every day.

My swollen eyes grew heavy, the stars above beginning to fade. But while I struggled to hang on to the memories I so dearly wanted to cherish, one thing was clear.

It was time to plan my escape.

---