Page 45 of Cruel Devotion

Eli changed me.

I was a changed woman.

I didn’t mean that only in the sense that his kiss surprised me. It had.

I didn’t mean that merely in the fact that he was really good at it. He was.

It was safe to assume that kissing my bully had altered my brain chemistry.

Every chance we had, we’d sneak somewhere private and do it all over again.

In the library. Outside under a tree on the campus square. At the lobby of his dorm. And even in the women’s bathroom when he followed me in there and locked it so no one could come in.

It was like we’d unleashed years’ worth of desire neither of us were ready to acknowledge. It just built and waited, growing and growing. His apology was only the beginning of setting me on the path to forgive him, but I’d be a liar if I said I hadn’t noticed him all along.

Nat:Having a crush on a bully isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve heard of.

I winced, waiting for Finn to drop Eli off at my house. Aunt Cindy was at work, picking up a little shift at the daycare where she used to work full-time. But I didn’t intend to be alone tonight.

Texting my sister took off the edge of waiting. I didn’t want to literally stand at the front door and watch out the window for him.

Haley:But?

Nat:But nothing. It makes sense. Enemies to lovers. Those are my favorite movies.

I wasn’t looking for validation from her, but I appreciated having her as someone to talk to. Davina didn’t seem sure about my hooking up with Eli. She was skeptical, having witnessed him bullying and teasing me for so long. Yet, she didn’t try to talk me out of whatever I wanted to do with him. Making out, copping a feel, and…

Maybe more.

In the last week and a half that we’d proven to each other that we couldn’t keep our eyes or hands off each other, I wasn’t sure what to call him.

Haley:I guess enemies to lovers would fit.

Haley:Not that we are lovers. I haven’t done that yet.

Nat:Make sure you want to give your V-card to him.

Nat:Don’t end up like me, either. I love Grayson, but I didn’t enjoy getting knocked up the night I lost my virginity.

Haley:I know.

Haley:And I’m not ready to take that step.

Haley:He’s just my bully with benefits?

Haley:I’m being careful.

Knocks sounded on the front door, and I whirled around to open it.

“H—”

Eli didn’t let me finish saying hello. He strode in, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me hard.

Oh, yeah.

I kissed him back, framing his face as he kicked the door closed behind him.

I’m being really careful.

---