Page 44 of A Beautiful Crime

Because the man who is The Devil of the East Coast, the monster who I am forced to marry, the dark soul who instills fears and shows no mercy to any soul defended me earlier this week.

Constantine Donati defendedme.

And in the same breath he threatened Luca in my name.

He’s a beautiful enigma wrapped in sin.

And I must confess that I want to solve the conundrum that is Constantine.

My mamma would want me not to be blinded by the beauty of the rose because the thorns would get me.

But with Constantine the thorns are seen. And those thorns with blood dripping down the stem are just as enthralling, if not more, than the petals.

“Do you believe that people can be all good, Father?” I ask him softly.

“I believe that people are good, my child, and that sometimes they lose their way.” His voice is kind and I know that he’s trying to reach a part of my soul that is no longer there.

“And what if they aren’t?” My voice shakes slightly at the end. I swallow. “What if sin has tempted them and they like how it feels?”

He hums again but this time it’s troubling. “Everyone falls to sin, my child, but that does not mean that they can’t be redeemed. All souls under the love of God can be redeemed.”

If I could laugh, I would. I have to place my hand over my mouth to suppress the dark chortle of laughter that wants to break free.

Redemption.

As if there is such a thing as redemption.

Can souls as dark as mine be redeemed?

My hands are forever stained red.

Can a murderer be redeemed?

“What if they can’t be redeemed, Father?”

“Everyone can be redeemed, my dear child. Everyone deserves the chance to try,” he says softly. “I believe that in every person there is light inside them. It can be grand or just a flicker. But as long as they have a semblance of light, they have hope. And with that light, with that hope, they can try again, my child. They have the chance to be redeemed. Even the ones who have divulged in sin and liked it. There will always be light, my child. And the light will always prevail.”

I want to believe him. In the dark depths of my soul and my black bleeding heart I want to believe the words that Father Frank says with absolute conviction.

At one time I did.

Before my rebirth I saw a world, a world where people were meant to be good. A world that believed in forgiveness. A world that was kind.

But my eyes have been opened and I see the world for what it really is.

It’s corrupted.

Evil.

In my world, where evil lives and breathes, where monstrous acts are praised, where living in sin is the only way to survive, how can there be someone who possesses a flicker of light?

There can’t.

And it’s beyond foolish of me to even consider myself or rather anyone of being good.

But if that is true, if there is no goodness, if there isn’t a flicker of light left in any of our damned souls, why did Constantine defend me?

And if The Devil of the East Coast does have a flicker of light inside him why is he bestowing that light upon me?

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