Page 152 of A Beautiful Crime

CHAPTER 33

Carina

“Giuseppe!” His name is a cry of pure joy and warmth. And there’s shock in his eyes from the outburst of emotion.

He looks well. A bit under duress but well nonetheless. A few more wrinkles have graced their presence as well as a couple more grey hairs.

Gino had not been lying when he informed me of how stressed Giuseppe has been over the past couple months.

He holds his hands out to me and I take them. “La mia forte bellezza,” he softly croons. Tears spring in my eyes. It has been far too long since I’ve heard his term of endearment. “I have missed you greatly.”

I squeeze his hands tenderly before I take a step closer. “I have missed you as well. Please tell me you didn’t worry too much.”

His hands squeeze mine in return. “One can never worry too much. Certainly when it comes to you.”

Warmth spreads through me like a wildfire. And I welcome the burn of his affections. “I’m very well,” I’m quick to ease his mind but I can tell by his troubled eyes he doesn’t believe me.I don’t expect him to. He believes I’ve traded one prison for another. Shackled to a life of misery and cruelty. He couldn’t be more wrong. Constantine has freed me.

“He is not a good man,” he begins with trepidation. He works a rough swallow, his hands on mine tightening. “This is not a life I wanted for you.”

I understand his fears. I understand his worry. This is a man who had bestowed upon me a kindness when I was starving for it. Protecting me is woven in his blood. His allegiance never lied with my papa, it has always lied with me.

I pat his hand gently. “Come sit with me.” I steer him in the direction of the luxurious yet inviting sofa that resides under the skylight. For once I don’t seek the warmth of the sun. I no longer need the light to cleanse my soul.

“You were right to worry in the beginning, Giuseppe. Your fears were valid. You were in the dark about the man who is to be my husband. As is the rest of the world. To everyone he is The Devil of the East Coast. The Don of The Donati Famiglia. A king of the underworld. But to me, to me he is just a man. A man whom I’m very much in love with.”

He sucks in a sharp breath as his eyes widen in horror. He removes his hands from mine and stands abruptly. His eyes are sharp on mine with a plea I will never grant him. “He’s corrupted you. Seduced you into falling in love with him.”

And while I hold Giuseppe very dear and near to my heart I will not allow him to slander the man who has awakened me.

I rise and stand beneath the skylight. “You will never accuse Constantine of such heinous acts ever again. Do you understand me?”

He flinches. “Am I supposed to fear you now, too?”

My heart flares yet I stand my ground. “I never wish for you to fear me, but I will not allow you to insult the man who freed me.”

Pain mares his features. “You will choose him?” He sounds as if I’m betraying him. Digging the knife in his back as if I had one to begin with.

“If you are asking me to abandon this life and live one without him by my side I will not do it.” His face falls as a deep sorrow enters his eyes. And although I wish to not cause him pain he must purge these delusions. “I will choose him. Every time. There is not a world where he and I don’t belong together. This isn’t about choice, Giuseppe. This is what’s meant to be.”

He nods his head defeatedly. “Yes, Constantine had echoed the same sentiments.” A somber smile strains his lips. In his eyes it’s as if he’s saying goodbye.

And I don’t understand.

I cross the area and stand before him. Perhaps a closer look will help me decipher what he’s trying to tell me. But I draw the same conclusion. A farewell.

“He isn’t the man I would’ve chosen for you. Nor is he the man your mamma would’ve chosen for you.” The mention of mamma causes a great pain for the both of us. “She desperately wanted to escape this life. And she had wanted the same for you.”

I think of my late mamma. The beautiful woman was shrouded with fear. Backed viciously in a corner and sold a beautiful lie. Her sweet escape came with her death. I’ve never faulted her for it. Never thought of her suicide as a sin. No, her only sin was marrying papa.

“Mamma was brought into this life by deceit. Papa the great illusionist. But my eyes are wide open and I am unafraid. This life is mine. And I am truly sorry if it pains you to hear it but you must know it to be true.”

He drops his shoulders with resignation as a heavy sigh escapes him. But along with the grim fate he believes I’veaccepted with goodbye in his eyes he holds a smile of admiration.

“I always believed once you found your voice you would be a true force to be reckoned with. I never expected Constantine of all men to bring it out of you.” He comes to stand before me, taking my hands in his once again. His eyes glitter with unshed tears. “I had hoped for a better life for you. One without bloodshed and darkness. But I know I cannot change your mind. And I would only be lying to myself if I didn’t see the light back in your eyes. You’re glowing, Carina. You no longer need the sun to feel warmth.”

My bottom lip trembles as tears build in my eyes. And as one manages to fall he catches it with his thumb while wearing a bittersweet smile. My heart flares as I stare at the man who loved me when my own papa didn’t. A man who loved me when I didn’t love myself.

“Why do I feel like you are saying goodbye to me?”

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