Page 85 of A Love Like Venom

She used to look at me with hope. Her honey brown eyes saw magic in mine. When she looked at me I thought I was more powerful than the stars we wished upon.

After everything that I have done how can she ever look at me that way again?

When I was with her, I believed I could be someone good. Being without her has only proved just how unworthy I am. Revealing what I have known all along.

I have always been a monster.

Being with her only tamed the demons inside but never relinquished them.

But once upon a time she saw me as her savior, she told me.

Can I be her savior again?

I don't know but I'm going to do my fucking hardest trying.

"Can you do me a favor?" I ask of him.

He raises a brow. "What do you need?"

"Can you make sure Jessica Finley isn't here when we come back? Alice doesn't need to deal with her bitchy attitude."

"She's already gone. Rosa saw her in your room and told her to get the fuck out. No one questions The President's Old Lady and that includes the stubborn Jessica Finley," he informs me which brings a small relief.

There's one thing I won't have to deal with when we get back. With the way Jessica has been acting I don't need her around Alice. She'll see me with her and get her claws out. Having a clingy biker bunny is one thing but having a jealous biker bunnyis a whole other thing. Especially when the girl has no right to be jealous in the first place.

Alice has dealt with enough, including my fucking ass, she doesn't need a catty girl on top of it.

For now on I'm protecting that girl from everything even if that means myself.

I hate that I have to say that when before I would have never had to.

My momma would be ashamed of me. She's probably staring down at me from the pearly gates with disappointment.

There's not a tougher pill to swallow.

My momma loved me unconditionally, but she also warned me of what not to be. I remember when I finally introduced Alice to her, and I remember what she told me afterwards."She's special Reed but don't mistake her kindness as a weakness. You do best to remember that, too."

She was a wise woman, my momma. Insight that was always spot on and I should have listened to her more than I should.

And I did listen to her about Alice. When I was younger, I wanted to protect that girl from anything. I didn't want to let the tragedies of Hollows Point to touch her. With me I was her shield, and she was my beacon of light.

Alice taught me that kindness was a strength. In return I gave that to her and everything else I had to offer.

Until the day came to where I didn't.

I'll never forgive myself for that.

The rest of my days I will repent the sins that I have done.

Eventually I reply to Oak absentmindedly, "Good, that's good."

He claps my shoulder which causes me to snap out of my inner thoughts. If I stay there any longer my mind is going to send me in a downward spiral. Then he lays a firm hand on myshoulder as he stares at me seriously. "Go to her. Talk to her but do not under any circumstance pressure her."

Shrugging his hand off me I snap back, "What the fuck? I would never fucking do that. What do you take me for?"

"That's not what I meant."

Taking a step away from him, my feathers ruffled I ask disgusted, "Then what the fuck did you mean?"

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