Page 134 of A Love Like Venom

"It was a door. A fucking door, Snake!" He then kicks the bag, moving it several feet across the floor.

"What about the door?"

His face twists with torment as he fists his hand over his heart. Blood from his knuckles stains his shirt. Eyes that are no longer glaciers turn haunted. "It slammed. The door fucking slammed!"

Oak is used to doors slamming all the time. Living in this club house doors slams every day. This is either a new trigger or more has triggered him today and the slamming of the door was the icing on the cake.

"What else happened?"

"Nothing else happened. The compound was quiet and then I heard a door slam from my room and suddenly I was back there. Back when I ordered Miguel to breach through the door. And on the other side we were met with gunfire. Taking us all down except for me. That door slammed and I was back at war, Snake. And it felt too fucking real."

"You're home now, Oak," I gently remind him. "You're not at war. You're here with your brothers. Safe."

"I'm crippled by the sound of a door slamming, Snake. My mind is fighting against me. Tell me how that's safe."

"You won't always be at war with yourself, Oak. One day those demons of yours will tire and allow you to rest."

"Yeah? And how are you so sure?" He questions brokenly.

"Because they have for me and I know one day they will for you, too." They have to. No other man is more deserving of peace than him.

"She's forgiven you."

I nod my head. "It's more than that, Oak. She accepts me. All of me. And she's not afraid."

"The girl is in love with you."

The smile on my face forms naturally when I think of her. "She does and I love her."

A smile of his own appears on his face but it's strained. "I'm happy for you brother, believe me I am. You're becoming a better man because of her. I just don't think that's in the cards for me."

"You told me once that we can't be the men we were before. You were right, Oak. If I had stayed the man I was I would've never gotten her back. Being someone better, for her and for me, changes everything. There are possibilities now, Oak. A future for me. There's one for you, too."

He claps me on the back of the shoulder. Sadness clouds his features. "A future sounds nice but that future is nothing but a dream. I'm stuck in the past, Snake and these day's I'm finding it harder to get out."

He goes to pass me, and I can't help the sinking feeling I have in my chest.

I have never heard him this lost before. This defeated.

Oak is a man who never gives up.

Why now?

He might be giving up, but I won't fucking let him.

The man has more fight in him. He just needs someone to encourage him to keep going even when it becomes too fucking hard.

Stopping him I place a firm grip on his bicep. Glancing down at my hand and then back at me he raises an eyebrow. "You say it's hard but that doesn't mean impossible. Take your own advice, Oak. Stop trying to be the man you were before."

Shaking his head, he then removes my hand from his arm. "Is that all?" From his expression and the finality in his tone I can tell he's done with this conversation.

That's fine but it doesn't mean I won't be having this conversation again soon.

With that being said I did originally come to the compound to speak with him about matters surrounding Alice. I believe now more than ever he's the man for the job. He needs different scenery. To be around new people to keep his mind occupied.

"I need a favor from you."

"What is it?"

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