He turns to face me then realizes he’s got his dick out and fixes himself. “That’s… let me wash my hands.”
I zip up and follow him to the sink, our eyes meeting in the mirror.
“I’m happy for you Seb.”
“I can’t do it.”
“Why not?”
“You know why not.”
He takes a step closer and puts his hands on my face and just looks at me with that stupid intensity that makes me melt. He pulls me in by the neck and puts his arms around me, squeezing gently. It feels like I’m being bundled up and… protected. That familiar smell assaults my nostrils and the warmth of his body cocoons me, and I never want him to let go.
The door opens and we break apart. The guy who came in looks like he’s pretending he didn’t see anything.
AUSTIN
While I sit next to my ma in the booth, I can’t stop looking over at Seb, thinking about what it felt like to put my arms around him again. His smell in my nose.Fuck I miss him.
When we finish the second pitcher, Gray and Seb leave us to catch up. Ma only had one beer and drives us back to her hotel. She drives slow on the quiet college roads. The radio crackly on the only local country station before it cuts out completely.
“Did I tell you how proud I am of you?” She says.
“Only like a million times.”
She laughs. “Well, get used to it, because I’m never gonna stop.”
“Okay.”
“Hey, you know what I’m most proud of you for right?” She flips the indicator to turn right and the littleclick clickfills the silence. “It’s not getting drafted or being captain or winning awards, I’m most proud of you for the person you are.”
I swallow.Fuck, why do I feel like I’m gonna cry?
“You were always a good kid, but I’m still amazed by the kind, honest man you’ve become. So just keep being him, and no matter what happens, I’ll be proud of you.”
I clench my jaw to stop from crying. Ma asks me what’s wrong. I shake my head.
“Is it Seb?”
“What?”
She pulls the car over onto the side of the road and takes her seatbelt off to face me.
“I knew when you brought him home that there was… something. You know I’m proud of you Austin, you can talk to me about anything. You don’t have to have any secrets-”
“We were… together.”
She slow nods. “Were? What happened?”
“We’re not… right for each other.
“Why not? Because he’s rich?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“I thought you wanted me to be with Alyssa?”