Page 76 of Unlovable Player

He swallows and asks me what I’m doing, but there’s no fight in his voice.

“Shh.”

I take his cock out and Austin buries his free hand in my hair with a sigh.

“Fuck Seb.”

While Austin’s scent fills my nostrils, I tell myself that Austin isn’t incorruptible after all. He’s not above drinking my father’s expensive champagne and getting blown at a party. Tomorrow, he’ll wake up and realize this isn’t him.I’mnot him. And he’ll go running back to Alyssa.

“Sebastian!”

Austin flinches so violently I almost bite him.

I wipe the saliva from my mouth as I turn to face my dad. He’s closed the door behind him, his face so scrunched up I can barely see his eyes.

He turns to Austin. “Young man, I think it’s time you left.”

Austin mutters an apology while he zips his trousers up.

“I can’t even look at you,” Dad says to me. He shakes his head and runs a hand over his face in a manner I recognize all too well. He’s trying to decide what to do with me. Maybe this time, I’ve finally done it? He sighs and turns to leave, slamming the door behind him.

As soon as he leaves, I burst out laughing.

Austin’s face when he looks at me should be enough to tell me what he’s thinking. Finally, he’s seen me for the piece of shit that I am.

“Why are you laughing?” His face is red and he hasn’t tucked the shirt back in properly. “Your dad just walked in on us…” He stumbles over his words. “Don’t you take anything seriously?”

I should just let him walk out of here. But there’s a little bubble of anger that won’t stay down.

“What do you want from me?”

He frowns, his mouth open.

I open my mouth to tell him what I’m really thinking.Do you want me to cry because my dad thinks I’m a piece of shit?Do you know what I’d give to have had your life? Someone who’d make the kind of sacrifices for me your mom made for you? I was just here. An heir. Someone to show off to their associates. Someone to carry on the family name. But you…

I can feel a sob building at the back of my throat and fuck it if I’m going to cry in front of him.

I paint on my most obnoxious, ‘shit-eating’ - as Austin described it – grin.

“You don’t like it? There’s the door.”

He looks at me like I just murdered his puppy and my insides turn to water.Stop it.A voice in my head says.He likes you, you can make it work.

Fuck off,I tell it. But it’s waiting. Hoping Austin will stay. For a second, it looks like he’s going to. Readying himself to tell me I’m not a piece of shit. That I’m worth all the trouble I bring everywhere I go. And then he sighs and shakes his head before walking out the door.

I sink into the armchair with a moan. Bite the inside of my lip to stop from crying. This was what I was expecting, right? For him to see the real me and be disgusted. To realize he can do better and leave. So why does it feel so fucking bad?

AUSTIN

Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Why the hell did I let him do that? Why did I drink that champagne? Wear this stupid suit? Because I wanted to impress him. I wanted to show him I could fit into his world. And now I’ve fucked everything up. To his dad, I’ll always just be that guy he caught his son sucking off at a party.

I hesitate at the top of the stairs, something telling me to go back. He didn’t mean it. I’ve seen the real him, and it’s not this. Or have I just been a fucking idiot? Wishful thinking.

I see his dad pause in the hallway when he sees his wife and rush down the stairs and out of the house before he can find me and kick me out. Maybe it’s best to give Seb time to cool down and get the fuck out of this house?

I already felt like I didn’t belong here the second I stepped inside and his mom looked at me like something Seb had just dragged in off the street. These old money rich people can’t be fooled by a borrowed Armani suit and some hair gel.