Page 150 of Red River

After I lost my father when I was eighteen, I had to run the house when I was just a lost, clueless kid—but I had to take care of Andrew, so I tried my best. What else was I supposed to do?And so I stumbled through life, never really feeling whole, never truly fulfilled, always in the wrong place.

Before I got fat, my good looks helped me get by—people gave me more than I deserved, let things slide. Bank officers were willing to approve more loans than they should have. My smile made people like me, but in the end, everyone eventually saw through me.

Your parents did, too. They saw what was beneath. And I tricked you, too, with my charm, my smile, and my promises.

My angel… You were so beautiful that I was afraid to even look at you, in case you disappeared like a dream, like an illusion. Sometimes, when you slept, I dared to watch you for hours—your perfect little face, sweet lips, and those long auburn lashes—fearing that I was using up my time and would inevitably lose this lovely mirage.

And you started to disappear… year by year.

That day, when I came back from the doctor, determined to lose weight and have the surgery, I got a phone call.

The number was unknown. The voice on the other end belonged to a strange man.

It was the most terrifying conversation of my life.

I was shaking as he spoke. There was something dark about him, River. A real, consuming darkness.

He said: 'Let River go. If you keep forcing him to carry all of you for one more year, he will die. The stress will break him. He gave you twenty extra years—you owe him your life, and you owe him his freedom. If you don’t remove yourself from his life within the next few months, you will be removed.'

I responded, 'Who the hell are you? How dare you?!'

And he replied, 'His True Mate is already waiting for him. He wants River but can’t have him—because you’re in the way. Let River go, and his life will change for the better. Give back what you stole from him. Give him back his happiness!'

'Who are you?!' I yelled again.

'Someone who won’t tolerate a parasite like you much longer.'

'Are you his True Mate?!'

He let out a low, chilling laugh.

'No, I’m not. And River doesn’t even know his TM exists. But I know about him. Let River go… or pay the price.'

Then he hung up.

For days, I walked around in shock. But eventually, I realized… Whoever he was, he was right.

I stole your youth.

I stole your joy.

And now, it’s time I give it back. I won’t get the surgery. I won’t stop eating junk food.

I’ll hurt you a little more… but only for a while.

And then, you’ll be free again. My River. My angel.

I love you more than anything in this world… even though I’m just a beggar who had the honor of living with a prince.

Forgive me, River. Please… don’t hate me. Find it in your heart to forgive me.

I dared to look into the red, beautiful sun. And I burned.

Thank you for saving my life back then. I hope I can return the favor now.

T."

Reading it—was like an avalanche of stones hitting my defenseless body, shaking me, tumbling me over—but somehow, I still stood.

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