Page 126 of Guarded

“How much sooner?” I ask.

“Two weeks.”

Chapter 37

Nero

8 YEARS OLD

“Eat it,” Evangeline yells.

Days of hunger had a way of rewiring your brain. Tala and I fight against each other to get to the spoonful of spaghetti Evangeline throws onto the floor. We had been chained up in the dungeon Evangeline created from the limited space in the shed.

Three days later, and you just don’t care about the food or its presentation. Cramming the noodles and red sauce into our faces, Tala and I devour the spoonful, unsure of when we’ll be able to eat again.

Evangeline opens the oven, and the smell of garlic hits my nostrils. My stomach begins to rumble.

“How hungry are you, Tala?” she asks, holding the pan of French bread above us.

I look at my sister, whose usually bright face has sunken in. Summer vacation was killing us. The dungeon was a living hell. Texas humidity made our nights restless. Not having food or water for three days made us weak.

“Punch Nero.” Evangeline commands.

Tala starts shaking her head, her resistance making Evangeline smile.

“Punch him in the face, and you’ll both eat.”

This was one of Evangeline’s favorite games with us. She got a high off, making us hurt one another. I smile at my sister.

“It’s okay, Tala. Just do it.” Her hands shake at her sides, and tears run down her face.

“Do it now, Tala, or the deals off! Neither of you will eat.” Evangeline orders.

Tala slaps me across the face with a light force.

“Harder!” Evangeline screams.

When Tala doesn’t move, the bad thing grabs me by the hair and delivers a fist to my nose. Tala cries out when blood spouts from my nostrils.

“Like this!” Evangeline says, holding me up by my hair and offering Tala a free shot. Tala closes her eyes as her hand balls into a fist. Her fist hits me in the same place my mother had.

Some people would claimthat pain is essential to teaching.

That it created defining moments. I say fuck those people. Tala and I, having endured Evangeline’s abuse and even being forced to hurt one another, didn’t do anything monumental for us.

Walking around, feeling like my heart had been ripped out of my chest, wasn’t a very defining moment for me either.

In the month since Ari had ended things, I’d spiraled. Downward. Back into the pitch-black world where color and light ceased to exist.

Where pink ceased to exist.

My nights became a mission to chase death, starting bar fights so that I could let my frustrations out. Standing there while they hit me and taking every hit. I’d pull that bitch Evangeline out from her grave and let her hurt me all over again just to numb myself from this pain. This ache in my heart.

“This should have been over a long time ago.”

Ariella’s words cut like a fucking knife. It should have been over long ago, but I let myself get involved with Cassiel’s games.

That’s where the line blurs, though. If I hadn’t been so willing to play his accomplice, I would have never met her. I’d never let my guilt convince me to apply for the bodyguard position. Everything that happened between us would cease to exist. I’ll take the mistakes I made over, never knowing her at all.

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