Page 75 of Hell Gate

I lift my head, my mouth set. “I don’t want to keep running. I’m sick of it.”

“We’ll find out who did this to you, little flower,” Vale promises. “And then we’ll make them fucking pay.”

The others echo his vengeful sentiment. It sends a shudder of adoration through me, leaving me weak in the knees.

“I’ll call Rainer back before he gets far and meet up with him,” he continues. “We’ll strategize the best gate to use to sneak into the underworld. They blocked us from using ours and we wouldn’t want to risk going through it if they’ve set up anyone there to capture us, but if we retrace our steps to an area they already tracked us it should provide enough cover to get to Hell.”

“What about me?” A spike of anxiety hits me. “They’ve spent this long keeping me out of the underworld. We could go through the gate and it could destroy me.”

Valerian crushes me against his chest and the others mutter unhappy sounds of refusal. “You are a powerful demon,” Valerian says firmly. “Even though your kidnappers bound you, you chipped away at the seal, allowing your power to seep through. The portal’s magic will recognize your place is in the underworld and grant you safe passage.”

“Humans have come through the gates before,” Alder reminds me. “As guards, we’re meant to deal with them, but they have crossed over from the mortal realm. You’ll also go through with us surrounding you as extra protection.”

His reassurance that they won’t make me go through this alone helps.

“Once we’re in the underworld, I think we’ll be able to break the seal by getting you back where you belong,” Valerian says. “The energy of the realm will restore you to your full strength rather than keep you in this starved state. You’ll have the power to break the seal on your own, shattering through the cracks to free yourself.”

“I don’t know. You really believe I can do that?” I push out of his arms to face the three of them, holding up my hands. “Guys, I’ve barely learned to control this in the last few weeks.”

Alder steps forward to cradle my face. “You can do it. Trust in your own strength. And if you can’t do that, then trust in us. When you falter, we’re here to catch you. We believe in you even when you don’t, mate.”

My throat clogs and my eyes glisten as I stare back at him, then shift my attention to Matthias and Vale. Their solemn gazes choke me up even more. They believe I can do this. That for them, I’m enough.

Their support lends fortitude to my own tattered belief in myself.

The ones who kidnapped me wanted to kill me and they almost succeeded. What they didn’t know is that every time I’ve been knocked down, abused, rejected, tossed aside and forgotten, I’ve gotten the fuck back up and kept going. I survived and I’ll keep fighting for my right to exist, to live on in spite of those who would rather see me dead.

Blinking away tears, I nod in determination. Alder kisses my forehead.

“I’ll go find Rainer. Once I’m back, we’ll leave and start our journey back up the coast,” Valerian says.

Matthias gives me a crooked smile when Alder steps away and kisses me. Before I’m ready, I’m tugged away, Valerian’s mouth claiming mine. He murmurs my true name against my lips like a prayer.

“I’m going to squeeze some practice in,” I say.

“I’ll be out shortly to join you,” Alder says. “Don’t overdo it.”

“Yes, sir,” I sass with a mock salute.

His scorching gaze sweeps over me and I smirk.

Matthias tugs on a lock of my short wavy hair as he passes, winking at me. “I’m going to pack up and see what I can scrounge up. If we’re stocked longer, we’ll only need to stop for gas.”

“Don’t even think about taking anything from that creepy ass shrine, Matthias,” I warn.

The devious grin he flashes over his shoulder tells me he’s absolutely going to do that. A soft, fond laugh leaves me.

Once I change into a pair of leggings and find a forgotten hair tie in the bathroom to secure my hair half up, I head out to my makeshift training course. Part of me is going to miss this cabin when we have to go. It’s been our safe haven, and I’ll always remember it as the place where my mates forged a deeper connection with me. Where I chased what I wanted and let them in.

Practice starts off rougher than I’d like as anxiety creeps back in. Even if we make it to the underworld without getting caught, what will it mean for me if I can break the seal?

I frown as the fire whip I visualize sputters out pitifully, nowhere near as badass as the whip Valerian wields. Switching to fire blasts, I start jogging, punching my shaky balls of flames through the air, imagining them hitting targets on the move.

My thoughts plague me while I continue to work. If I die, is that it, or will I reincarnate again? Or worse, when the seal breaks, will I return to my true form as Lilith and forget everything about myself as Lily? I don’t want to give my fears life, but the second they flit into my head, they take flight, sweeping through me.

An unnatural explosive sound, followed by a roar of pain, cuts through the woods and makes my heart stop. I swear that was Alder. It didn’t come from the direction of the cabin. Forgetting about training, I cast a frantic gaze around to search for the source. Another yell that sounds like Matthias pierces my heart.

“Lily!” That angry, agonized bellow comes from Vale.

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