Page 5 of The Re-Proposal

Looking back and forth, I limp to the nearest bathroom.

It’s empty.

I let out a breath of relief and bend over to inspect my shoes. It’s busted. The only solution I can see is to break the other heel so I stop walking like a penguin. With a mighty heave, I slam my shoe against the sink. The stick breaks like a twig.

Now I have equally scuffed ballet flats.

I slip them on and realize that the shoes are still uneven thanks to the tiny bit of a heel at the end. But at least it doesn’t look as obvious.

I discard the stick and wash my hands.

Just then, two employees walk in. They smile politely at me. I smile back and mind my own business until their conversation drifts to my ears.

“Did you see the group chat?”

“Yeah, I wish I was upstairs when it happened.”

“Can you imagine breaking your heel at a moment like that? It must have been humiliating.”

I freeze in the middle of throwing away the paper towel. Slowly, my gaze drops to my newly-transformed flats.

“How pathetic do you have to be that you can’t even dress well during a pitch? I mean, come on. She can’t even afford proper shoes?”

“Exactly. Maybeshe’sthe one who needs charity.”

“Help yourself before trying to help others. It’s common sense.”

A lump forms in my throat. I squeeze the paper towel tightly, my body trembling.

Should I say something? But what can I say that won’t make me even more pathetic?

“How areyourshoes? Can’t have you breaking a heel in front of our new boss.”

“Have you seen his pictures? He’s so hot.”

“I know! Why do you think I’m doing my makeup? My dream is to be a rich man’s wife.”

They laugh together.

I shrink into the background until the girls finish re-touching their makeup.

Finally, they’re gone.

My hands unclench and I release the paper towel. It sinks into the trash. Crumpled. Used. Discarded.

Just like me.

With a deep breath, I keep the tears back and find my brave face. I’m an adult now. Words can’t hurt me.

Or at least they shouldn’t.

But the shame is cloying, like cheap perfume, and I can’t outrun it.

I wait a few moments before tiptoeing out of the bathroom and sneaking into the elevator.

The words I overheard taunt me.

Help yourself before trying to help others.

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