I want the ground to swallow me up, but I’ve never been that lucky.
Facing my ex, I say, “You don’t have to rehash the past. Ten years is a long time. We don’t owe each other anything.”
Cody gives me a heavy look, his eyes scouring my face.
The past is pressing too close to the present, like a nail sliding into a balloon. One more push and the whole thing might pop.
“I… should go. Tell Island I’ll call her later.”
“Wait.” A ragged breath escapes him. It hits the back of my neck like a storm cloud. “I was a fool to let you go.”
My fingers ball into fists.
My heart throbs like I stubbed it against a side table.
“I know words don’t mean anything. And these words are ten years too late. But I’m sorry for leaving. I’m sorry for the way I did it. The way I hurt you. I’m sorry that I didn’t walk down the aisle with you like I promised.”
I flinch, forcing down all the memories that are trying to bubble up.
“It’s not much of an excuse, but I was young back then. And stupid. I regretted it the moment I left.”
“But you never came back,” I croak.
He’s quiet. Caught.
Just then, a little girl bursts into the kitchen.
“Uncle Cody and…” Regan grins up at me. “Miss… um… what was your name again?”
I blink rapidly. My arms are heavy like I’m slogging through jello.
“Her name’s Clarissa.” Cody swings his niece up and gives her a kiss on the cheek before meeting my eyes. “But if that’s too hard to remember, you can call her Ris.”
My mouth opens in shock.
“Ris?”
“Mm-hm.”
Regan bounces. “Is Ris going to be my auntie?”
Heat blazes in my cheeks.
“Not yet,” Cody says, glancing at me and then at Regan. “But I’m working on it.”
“Cody,” I hiss.
Regan wiggles out of Cody’s arms and marches right up to me. Looking up with her inquisitive gaze, she asks smartly, “You want to know why you should marry Uncle Cody?”
Something sharp hits my chest. My heart is in pieces.
“Because he’ll buy youallthe giraffes you want.” She spreads her arms wide. “Giraffes this big.”
I chuckle in spite of myself. If only love could be boiled down to how many stuffed giraffes a man could bring home. The world would be so simple. And my heart wouldn’t look like it had been put in the shredder.
“Hold on, booger. Ris isn’t ready to marry me quite yet. We need to work some things out first.”
“What kind of things?” Regan blinks inquisitively. She lowers her voice and says in a conspiratorial whisper. “Like math homework?”