Page 186 of The Re-Proposal

‘Roll with the punches’.That’s always been my philosophy. But what do you do when the punches don’t stop coming?

I groan, unable to sleep despite my body demanding it. I’ve been driving on pure adrenaline and sheer will. Sooner or later, I’m going to crash.

Sleep feels like a foreign concept anyway.

I’m in bed alone, craving Clarissa the way newly-converted vegans crave meat. I wish I could steal her away from the hospital, but Joel needs her more than I do tonight.

Going cold turkey is the least I can do.

Even if Joel hates my guts.

A sting that’s starting to become familiar cuts through the center of my soul. It’s like someone is flinging Japanese knives at my ribs.

I couldn’t care less about the hate organization that rallied to life because of me, but Joel’s anger makes me choke.

Control or be controlled, Cody.

I turn on my other side and harden my heart.

Whatever.

Joel is just some kid I took in. He’s old enough to forge his own path. Once I get him a heart, I’ll wash my hands. Forget he ever existed.

Things will go back to normal eventually.

I turn again and force myself to get some rest but, when I wake up the next morning, my eyes are gritty and it feels like I didn’t sleep at all.

There’s adingfrom the elevator.

I open the door and groan when I see Clay on the other side.

My brother’s jaw is as hard as steel.

“I’m guessing you didn’t find Winifred,” I mumble, stepping aside so he can walk in.

“No.”

I groan. This guy is like a cockroach. He keeps running around, dodging our boots.

Clay’s facial expression remains tightly severe. “How are you?”

“Me? I’m great. Ris hasn’t called, crying her eyes out, so Joel’s probably still alive. That’s good.” I shuffle to the coffee machine and start a brew. I’ll need caffeine for this conversation.

“Island and I went to visit Joel after dropping the kids to school this morning. He didn’t seem all that pleased to see us.”

“Oh, he hates me now,” I say it casually and pour myself a cup. “Coffee?”

Clay stares at me like he can see right through my BS. “Do I want to know?”

“Kid had a heart attack because he was so angry with me. You can fill in the rest of the blanks,” I snarl. Pain crawls into my stomach.

Sarcasm is the only reaction I can safely process. I don’t understand Joel’s sudden switch from lightly hating my guts to fully wanting to skin me alive.

It’s better not to think about it.

Cody shakes his head. “You don’t have to try so hard to convince me. Or yourself.”

“What are you talking about?”

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