Page 69 of Bad at Love

“And we leave tomorrow night?”

Storm smiles, and again… just stares for far too long before saying, “Yes.” Then he adds, “The next time we travel together, I’ll make sure to have an itinerary for you.”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you.”

When we finish breakfast, we go for a walk. I’ve never been to any of the islands and it’s beautiful here. We make our way down to the beach, walking along Maha'ulepu heritage trail.

“The beach here is so different from what I’m used to,” I say more to myself, but that doesn’t stop Storm from commenting.

“These islands are gorgeous.” Storm stretches, raising his arms high above his head. “I love it here.”

“You’ve been before?”

“Not to Kauai. I’ve been to the big island.”

“I traveled a lot when I was young, but not in over ten years.”

“That must have been nice, though? I’m guessing you went on family trips?”

I huff out a laugh. “Yeah, I used to think they were nice. Now I feel like everything was a lie.”

“It wasn’t a lie.”

“Feels that way.”

“Just because you see things with new eyes, doesn’t mean what you felt before was wrong.”

“Doesn’t it though? If it’s not real, if it’s not true, what’s the point?”

We fall into silence for a little as we walk, the loud crashing waves like a balm to my aching heart. My family has rankled me for a long time, and maybe for the last time. I’ve never fit in and they made it known that I didn’t. They never did a thing to make me feel like part of the family. I was a burden. But I still wanted to be part of them because they aremyfamily, and they are all I have. But something changed that day at my parents’ when my mother went off about the anniversary party and how I better not ruin it and she expects me to be there with a date. The onlything I can say is that I was like a volcano that finally had too much, and I erupted.

They’re my family, and deep down somewhere I love them, I guess, but I’m hurt. Out of the billions of people in this world, they are the ones who are supposed to accept me for who I am. I guess I always hoped they would at some point, and the fact that it was all for nothing is what hurts the most. Now it’s just me. I’m alone. Because I’m not good enough for anyone to make a priority.

“So, hypothetically—”

“I hate hypothetical questions,” I say with a shake of my head.

“Humor me, Gabe. You’ve come this far. You’re here, you got on a plane and left in the middle of the night, you stood up to your family, what’s a little more, hm?”

I huff, running a hand over my face. “I guess you have a point.”

“Good. Now listen up. Say you marry the person of your dreams, right? You live a long, happy life. You have the best, most perfect marriage with no stress. Bills are paid. Kids are well-behaved. You go on these amazing trips every year. You have romantic date nights. Truly, you live a dream life. You following so far?”

“Hard to believe, but yes, I’m following.”

“Okay, so amazing life. So in love, right? Then one day, your partner dies. You’re devastated because your life was so perfect, but also, you’re grateful to have had such an amazing life with them. You can look back and say that you don’t regret anything, that your life was absolutely perfect.”

“Okay…”

We slow our steps, going single file to let a group of people pass by us, and when we’re side by side again, he continues to talk.

“But then you find out your partner had a secret life. A life you knew nothing about. Like maybe they were cheating.” Ifrown, because that sucks. Everything was just so good, and now he ruined it. “Does that take away from the life you shared together?” he asks seriously.

“Yes,” I answer quickly. There is no reason to think about that. Yes, it takes it all away. It ruins it all.

“No, think about it, Gabe. Think about everything I just said, then think about the question again.”

“I don’t need—”

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