Page 54 of Bad at Love

“I know this is going to be an uncomfortable conversation, but it’s important we have it.”

“I agree,” I say, cutting a piece of chicken. It’s juicy and still hot.

“We’d discussed doing this for the money. I’ve been losing subs from lack of interesting content and you need money for when I leave.”

Yeah, for when he leaves… because that’s going to happen one day.

“Extra money now wouldn’t hurt either,” I add, just to make a point that it’s needed and that it’s why I’m doing this.

“Right,” he says, stabbing a potato. “I’ll admit I’ve gotten a little carried away, and I apologize for that, but I do think it was good for us to…” He tilts his head back and forth. “Get to know one another a little before we go on camera. The better we look together, the more money we will make.”

“Good idea.”

I hope he isn’t going to tell me he’s going to stop—because I don’t want him to stop.

“I marked up the contract we’d signed and left it on your desk in the office. Figured after we eat we can go in there and look at it together. It’s just amending a few things and adding a few things. To safeguard us both.”

I’d done a lot of research on relationships like this—of the sexual variety—and finding a contract wasn’t difficult. What was difficult was adding in the business terms and payment options. It took some time, but I managed to get it all together. Of course, that was before we started doing things. I hadn’t anticipated it going this way… It’s definitely not an issue, but we need to adjust the contract to reflect what we’re doing.

“Smart thinking.”

I bite into the roasted carrot. So good. Sweet with a smokey flavor.

“I also think we need to be more specific about content, which isn’t something I’d thought about earlier because… well, I’d assumed you had experience and I overlooked it.”

“Specific how?”

“Like a list of dos and don’ts. What you’re willing to do and not willing to do.”

“How will I know if I’ve never done them before?”

I pause with the fork halfway to my mouth, feeling stupid for asking that question. I didn’t mean for it to come out, it just did. I’m too comfortable with him—it’s getting dangerous.

“That’s the thing.” He puts his fork down and levels me with a stare that makes me nervous. I put my fork down next and take a sip of water. Storm’s about to say something I’m not going to like. I can tell by the look in his eyes. “We really need to communicate, Gabe. It’s the only way this will work. I know it’s hard for you, but if you don’t tell me what’s going on in your head at all times, we’re going to screw this up. And I don’t just mean money, I mean us. This… arrangement. I don’t want that.”

Wow, okay. That wasn’t bad at all. It almost seems like he cares.

“Neither do I,” I admit softly.

“So you will, then? Communicate?”

I take a deep breath, reaching for my water and take a long sip.

“I will try my best, as I have been doing.”

“Okay, cool. Yeah, that’s all I can ask. So, I printed out a list of things. For you to look over and check off.”

“No need,” I answer, digging back into my food. It goes quiet, and I look up to find Storm staring at me, confused.

“No need because…”

“Because yes to everything.”

“Yes… to everything?” he asks slowly. “What?”

I put my fork down again, folding my hands together and placing them on the table.

“I’m going to be very honest right now, and it’s not going to be easy for me, so please just listen.” He nods, settling into his seat and giving me his full attention. Storm is such a good listener. “What I’ve experienced these last few days with you in your bedroom has been amazing. I can’t believe I’ve been missing out on this my whole life, and I know that probably sounds silly to you, but I realize I’ve lived a sheltered life. While I’m enjoying this and not letting my head get in the way, I wanna go for it. Full steam ahead. I’m sure something will happen at some point to make me slow down, maybe even freak out, but isn’t that normal? That’s what normal people do, right?” He nods carefully. “So, while I’m on this track, I’d like to continue along.”

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